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Your humorous/WTF/Holy crap moments here


Wildmn34
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I was going to just post one thing in a nee thread but figured why not make a thread for a collection of good stories about encounters/experiences/etc that we have had in Skyrim.

 

Be warned that by the very nature of the thread there may be spoilers.

 

So, I'll start with my best one from last night.

 

I was going to the High Hrothgar. I was in the beautiful woods at the town before you go up the steps.

 

Off to my right I see a blue butterfly. "ooh pretty" So I start to chase it. It's a crafty little bugger, and does a brutal Barry Sanders double juke and gets past me. So, I turn to go back after it and get absolutely blasted by a bear. I never even had a chance to pull my ax, or a spell, or anything.

 

The only thing I managed to do was a little squeak of surprise and promptly dropped my controller and as I was picking it up watched this bear finish me off.

 

So, yes friends I was killed all because of a damn butterfly. I have learned my lesson and have an iron will not to repeat it. Unless of course I see something shiny once again and then the chase is on!

 

So, pull up a chair and a warm glass of mead and share your stories of times when you were less than stellar, and made judgments that a nine year old would scoff at.

 

I bid thee well, and look forward to your tales. :drunk

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at level 2, my first encounter with one of those giants. I had no idea what to expect so i went in with dual flame spells active. Apparently he thought he was playing golf, and i was the golf ball, cause when that club hit me i got launched into orbit.

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More of an 'Oh my god, im such a dumbass' moment than a WTF moment, but here it is...

 

I was doing the first main quest for the College of Winterhold to get my mage training or whatever, i was down in the tunnels and came across a door, with 2 statues with symbols above them either side of it. So i thought 'Ok, match the symbols, pull the lever, job done'. Matched the symbols, hit the lever, got shot by about 30 poisonous arrows. So i thought hmm ok, lets try that again with the symbols the other way around, didnt work, shot by more arrows. For the next 15 minutes i was spinning these statues around in every possible combination trying to get the damn door to open. When i do finally give up, i turn around to leave and try another quest when i notice there are 2 more sets of statues directly behind me.....

 

Facepalm.

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Lack of sleep has left me unable to think quite well, but the first thing that comes to mind is this.

 

 

After about 18 hours of gameplay, I decided to spoil myself and buy a horse. As I was riding out of Whiterun heading towards Riverwood (my stash of books is there and I had some more to add to my library :p) I saw a lady running towards me screaming "Help us please help us!" and then noticed two guards nocking arrows and aiming towards the sky. Oh how excited I was to have my first random encounter with a dragon!

 

Quickly I dismounted my horse and proceeded to nock my own arrow and line up my shot. There it was, a dragon headed in my direction, blasting a stream of firey breath straight towards ... my horse?

 

 

Needless to say my poor pony took off at a gallop towards the mountains, with the dragon hot on her heels. It was about this time that I found myself sprinting as fast as I could yelling "COME BACK!!" at the TV, 4:30 AM.

 

 

Don't worry folks, a happy ending was had by all! Ok well sort of....

 

 

After about 5 minutes I caught up to where my horse had gotten stuck on the mountainside and proceeded to loose arrow after arrow at the bastard who was torching my brand spanking new horse.

 

 

Finally I got it's attention and it came down to fight someone it's own size, I let out my rage and defended my horsies honor. As the dragon took one final blow from my (Exquisite) Scimitar, I let out a roar of victory.

 

 

That is when my Mrs threw a cushion at me and roared louder than any dragon possibly could to "Shut the hell up!"

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I am definitely guilty of running up to the first Giant I saw and tried to take it down, but with one feel swoop he stomped me into the ground.

 

I did just have a WTF moment, I went to Bleak Falls Temple and there is part of the a river that is flowing up hill. I went around the corner and I saw that and I just laughed because around the next corner the river was flowing down hill.

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I got the angry giant orbital gold swing treatment, too. I was so high it looked like the zoomed in world map. Haha! I almost didn't mind being killed.

 

Yep, this here too. It treated my poor lil Imperial like a baseball and sent her absolutely out of the park! :eek:

 

Also, had a dragon attack this farm where two dark elf sisters lived. Guard almost finishes off the dragon before I can even get there, and afterwards complains how his cousin is off fighting dragons while he is stuck on guard duty. The dragon killed the younger dark elf girl too, and her sister, who was yelling at her for being lazy not too long before, is standing there over her corpse like "whatever!" and making casual conversational comments to me.

 

Oh, and of course the little kid that took out a hit on me. Still debating whether to off his dog as a lesson. :mad:

 

Saw what looked like a corpse in the hot springs at a distance, but nope, not a corpse. A male and female hunter stripped down enjoying a bath. So I ran off with the clothes on the bank. :p

 

ETA: Forgot, also the dumbass bandit who ran screaming at me how I picked a bad time to get lost, and proceeded to get one-shotted with a sword through the gut! The kill animation was so seemless that it looked like he ran full speed into my sword.

Edited by Paka
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The first dragon you face just west of Whiterun had me in stitches. After shooting arrows for a couple of minutes, it landed next to the tower. A guard ran up to it to attack, and the dragon picked him up in his mouth, shook him violently, then let him go. Needless to say, being hurled into a solid stone tower is a great way to die.

 

First time ever in an Elder Scrolls game, I have decided to use Archery. So I was chasinh an Elk tryin to kill him, when we both ran off a cliff to our deaths like Lemmings.

 

Sure I'll have many more moments.

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I fast traveled to Dawnstar, I see a dragon a little ways away. Its fighting something I think guards maybe I cant see because of a cliff. I run over to help kill this Dragon, It was fighting 2 Giants!, I watched from the cliff and shot fireballs at it till it died, then the 2 giants(nearly dead) came after me. Running away and shooting fireballs worked well, 3 big kills at once it was great!

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I was on the golden claw quest and right after i cut the bandit down and he took off with the claw i gat destracted and started looting stuff. Right about that time he ran smack into the trap door (which i didn't see) all i heard was a death cry and all a sudden he went flying over my head and smashed into the wall...lol, i was like WTF!!

 

Then i casually looted his body and took the golden claw lmao.

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I was randomly travelling through the countryside when I accidentally wandered into a giants camp. The Giant didn't pay any attention to me though so I doubled back to walk round the camp, careful not to upset the Giants herd of Mammoths as I went.

 

As I was walking round the camp, a group of four bandits came charging out from behind some rocks, obviously thinking that a single Dunmer was an easy target. Taken by surprise, I barely had time to arm my self before they reached me.

 

Thinking I was done for, I was surprised to feel the ground moving beneath my feet. Looking to my left, I watched as two of the Mammoths charged down the hill at the bandits, with the Giant just behind them. I finished off the bandit who had engaged me, the Mammoths took out another and the Giant killed the other two before they had time to blink. His herd safe, the Giant headed back to his camp and I continued my journey with plenty of respect for the larger inhabitants of Skyrim.

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I was randomly travelling through the countryside when I accidentally wandered into a giants camp. The Giant didn't pay any attention to me though so I doubled back to walk round the camp, careful not to upset the Giants herd of Mammoths as I went.

 

As I was walking round the camp, a group of four bandits came charging out from behind some rocks, obviously thinking that a single Dunmer was an easy target. Taken by surprise, I barely had time to arm my self before they reached me.

 

Thinking I was done for, I was surprised to feel the ground moving beneath my feet. Looking to my left, I watched as two of the Mammoths charged down the hill at the bandits, with the Giant just behind them. I finished off the bandit who had engaged me, the Mammoths took out another and the Giant killed the other two before they had time to blink. His herd safe, the Giant headed back to his camp and I continued my journey with plenty of respect for the larger inhabitants of Skyrim.

 

^ that would have been really cool to see.

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Well, here is another, though it is more the people of Riverwood who will be saying WTF? ;) Damn dragon sure picked a perfect spot to bite the dust, right in the middle of the road! - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v57/bucfanpaka/dragonroadblock.jpg

 

Biggest issue I'm having with random dragons so far actually is that they are showing up in populated areas. I know I've lost one NPC already, and now I've got to go hunting around for bodies after killing them to see who else the dragon took down with it.

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Well, here is another, though it is more the people of Riverwood who will be saying WTF? ;) Damn dragon sure picked a perfect spot to bite the dust, right in the middle of the road! - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v57/bucfanpaka/dragonroadblock.jpg

 

Biggest issue I'm having with random dragons so far actually is that they are showing up in populated areas. I know I've lost one NPC already, and now I've got to go hunting around for bodies after killing them to see who else the dragon took down with it.

 

That reminds me of a scene out of the Flintstones. lol

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So I'm in the hot springs/geysers Dragon lair and a random Dragon shows up and attacks me... Hell yeah, Werewolf boi vs two Dragons......... Dragons didn't land, couldnt attack them... Noooooo!!! I wanted some werewolf Chuck Noris shit to go down... :( On the flip side I did see a Mammoth get sent miles by a geyser. :rock

 

 

My character is called Chuck Noris by the way.:)

Edited by Bulletman
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