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Old 01-26-2013, 02:40 AM   #1
JenniferGenGamer
 
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Which of these ways do you find the most effective in meeting and dating

Guys and girls?

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
2) Meeting people at the workplace
3) Meeting people through family and friends
4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

According to an article on the Guardian newspaper site, these were the most popular and successful ways people used to meet and date new people.

Personally for me, all of these have worked except for the workplace.
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Old 01-26-2013, 02:47 AM   #2
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Workplace never worked for me.
School its never serious, and there were very few girls in the classes I did at college.
Meeting people in a pub/bar is good if you drink (you know you probably have at least one thing in common). I don't drink however so I avoid it.
Never tried online dating and don't know anyone who has.
Through family and friends is probably the best way to go. As long as the friend/family sets it up properly (I was recently supposed to be set up with a friend of a friend but alas I never had the date).
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Old 01-26-2013, 02:51 AM   #3
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Heres my imput

School / College / University - Probably the first best place you could meet in the time you are there, after you're gone, becomes a bit harder as you are not in contact with these people on a daily basis.

Work - It can work but I'd say as long as you're not working with each other you'd be fine.

Family and friends - Friends, yes. Family? Not too sure

Pub / Bars / Nightclubs - Probably the best place in the early years of adulthood, look smart, get your groove on and do your thing and hope someone's drunk enough to go with the flow.

Online dating - I mean no offence here to anyone but I've always thought of online dating as a last ditch effort to meet someone. I've always thought that if you have to look online to meet someone then the person must have some sort of baggage..

Personally find meeting someone via friends is best for me.
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Old 01-26-2013, 05:23 PM   #4
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1) Meeting people through School/College/University

Wouldn't want to date someone that I have to see all day at school too.


2) Meeting people at the workplace

See above.


3) Meeting people through family and friends

Family and friends? What are these things?

4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs

The type of people that hang out in bars and nightclubs are definitely not the type of people I'd want to date.

5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

Nobody's who they pretend to be online.
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Old 01-26-2013, 05:54 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tsaako View Post
Online dating - I mean no offence here to anyone but I've always thought of online dating as a last ditch effort to meet someone. I've always thought that if you have to look online to meet someone then the person must have some sort of baggage..
I don't get why online dating still has this weird stigma attached to it. Two of my close friends are now living with their girlfriends that they met online, and I know of at least three people who got married to someone they met online. It can be hard to go out and find people who you have common interests with even if you try. At least with those websites you can kinda gauge what a person is like, then message them and see where things go from there. Also you can see whether the person is looking for an actual relationship or just something casual right away, which is helpful.

I do agree with you that friends are the best way of meeting someone, since if they're your real friend, they will know what you are looking for in a person and try to set you up with someone who fits that bill.

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4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs

The type of people that hang out in bars and nightclubs are definitely not the type of people I'd want to date.
This is hilarious.
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Old 01-26-2013, 06:38 PM   #6
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3) Meeting people through family and friends
This works for me. Some times I didn't even knew 'I had a girlfriend'. So my friends told me that the girl told them that she was my girl xD
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Old 01-26-2013, 06:45 PM   #7
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Old 01-27-2013, 07:53 AM   #8
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For me, it goes like this:

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
Impossible.

2) Meeting people at the workplace
Impossible.

3) Meeting people through family and friends
Impossible.

4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
Impossible.

5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
Impossible.
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Old 01-27-2013, 09:00 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fvkasm2x View Post
Smart, funny people who don't look like trolls meet every day and have conversations. It isn't hard. Online dating is like giving up.
What I don't get is how I'm smart and funny but all my attempts at acquiring a date in my 21 years have failed. I may have to turn to online dating at some point, sad to say. But then again, I'm a bit weary of online dating due to people pretending to be someone they're not. Don't want to be victim of an online dating murderer or something.
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Old 01-27-2013, 03:12 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nevander View Post
For me, it goes like this:

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
Impossible.

2) Meeting people at the workplace
Impossible.

3) Meeting people through family and friends
Impossible.

4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
Impossible.

5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
Impossible.
I can relate to that. Sucks doesn't it?
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Old 01-27-2013, 04:58 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JenniferGenGamer View Post
Guys and girls?

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
2) Meeting people at the workplace
3) Meeting people through family and friends
4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

According to an article on the Guardian newspaper site, these were the most popular and successful ways people used to meet and date new people.

Personally for me, all of these have worked except for the workplace.
1) Meeting people through School/College/University
My class is a sausage fest and my workload/job kinda leaves no time for going out. I can adapt and turn gay or that's a no no for me.

2) Meeting people at the workplace
God no, all of them are snobby cunts or twice my age.

3) Meeting people through family and friends
Nah, fuck that.

4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
I don't have the time.
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
God no.

FOREVAAA ALONE.
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Old 01-27-2013, 05:45 PM   #12
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I was told recently that it's most likely you'll meet your SO at work or through friends/family. I don't have any stats to back that up, but it sounds about right. Schools are good too, but obviously that option is only available for a limited time. If looking for someone to date I wouldn't try a bar, and especially not a club. No comments on online dating.
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Old 01-27-2013, 05:47 PM   #13
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1) Meeting people through School/College/University
I think when I was in college, it would have been easy to find a boyfriend in my classes. Because of the kind of classes I was taking, I always found guys with similar interests. If I didn't already have a boyfriend at the time, I definitely would have ended up dating some of the guys I made friends with from college classes.

2) Meeting people at the workplace
I would be hesitant about dating someone at work because if it didn't work out it would be awkward. Right now, there aren't exactly a lot of people where I work, so that wouldn't have worked for me anyway. Best friend #2 met her husband at work, so obviously it does work.

3) Meeting people through family and friends
This seems to work for a lot of people. That said, if I want to set up my friends, it never works out. Best friend #3 met her husband at our other friend's wedding.

4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
People are going there to get ass, not get a real relationship. That said, my older sister met her husband at a bar when they were both completely drunk... they've been married for seven years.

5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
It's obviously been effective for other people, so why not? I had two friends that always used Match.com. They had some pretty weird boyfriends and didn't end up with any of them. In fact, they usually turned out to be really creepy.

I "met" my husband on a gaming website that we both worked for. I had that other boyfriend at the time, so it wasn't anything more than editing articles or reading forum posts. We met in person a couple months later when our website went to E3. My boyfriend was there, haha, so obviously it's not like I was into the "other guy". When my boyfriend and I finally broke up, my husband and I had been keeping in touch through the website we worked on and had become friends, but it wasn't until like 8 months later that we started talking a lot more online and then hung out again in person and then started dating for real. I guess mine falls under work/online then?
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Old 01-27-2013, 06:24 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fvkasm2x View Post
IMO, because if you have good people skills, you shouldn't find it hard to meet people in real life.

Smart, funny people who don't look like trolls meet every day and have conversations. It isn't hard. Online dating is like giving up.
This is so ridiculous. It's not like I'm saying that you need to solely rely on a dating website to meet people, it's just another way of meeting people. It's not like if you lacked a personality and were ugly people would talk to you any more on a dating website than in real life.
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Old 01-28-2013, 05:59 AM   #15
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The workplace has always worked for me. Its just so easy.

Friends and family? Never.
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Old 01-28-2013, 06:22 AM   #16
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Originally Posted by dakisbac View Post
I was told recently that it's most likely you'll meet your SO at work or through friends/family. I don't have any stats to back that up, but it sounds about right. Schools are good too, but obviously that option is only available for a limited time. If looking for someone to date I wouldn't try a bar, and especially not a club. No comments on online dating.
i agree with above. it's usually like this

school = dating
work/family/friends = SO
online dating/bar/club = one night stand, casual dating

of course, you can meet your SO while at school or online dating or at a club but generally speaking, it'll come through work, family, friends (most likely through a gathering of some sort)

and work, that's one an iffy especially if it's career related (if summer job or just a job to pay for school, just go ahead and date). if the company you work at is small, you have to be careful. if it's a big one with multiple divisions, go ahead.
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Old 01-28-2013, 07:39 AM   #17
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As a married guy (which means there had to be the meeting, the dating, and everything else in between), I met my wife at a job we both mutually despised. lol

This was after many failed relationships (cheated on each time. Was even used as the guy my then-girlfriend was using to cheat on her current boyfriend, while she was cheating on me with yet another guy. I of course called it off after finding out that I was being used to break some other dude's heart, only to find the other fact out later...)

[X] Work: Pass
[X] School: Fail
[X] Online: Fail
[X] Friends: Fail
[ ] Family
[ ] Bar/Club (Not my style)

In the end, it just comes down to being the right person, in the right place, at the right time. Just be you, and it won't matter where you meet the person. It will either work out or it won't.
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Old 01-28-2013, 09:20 AM   #18
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Only had 1 (proper) boyfriend and I met him at work. He wasn't at work, he was a courier and it was my job to answer the door (i was the "office junior" so basically all the stuff nobody else could be arsed to do). The guys at school dont count coz I wouldnt say they were "proper" boyfriends. Now I have decided to stay single so dont really care about any of this. If I meet someone and we hit it off then fair enough but I'm def not going out deliberately looking for a guy...
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Old 01-28-2013, 08:28 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fvkasm2x View Post
People who say it IS hard, have something "wrong" with them. Maybe they aren't confident enough. Maybe they're into stuff that most people of the opposite sex aren't. Maybe they dress like imbeciles.

They could be nice, honest, caring, awesome people... but they have 1 thing that makes them a bit socially awkward. Meeting people online is for lazy people who don't want to make the effort and who are afraid of rejection. It's much easier to have your emails ignored than it is for a woman to tell you to piss off to your face.
What about people who have social disorders? Something they can't control and isn't their fault but that makes it almost impossible to meet people in real life? Does that make them lazy, or mean there is something "wrong" with them? (that's coming across as a very negative thing in your post)

It's not quite the same as dating, but all of my closest friends are people I've met online (and since met in real life)
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Old 01-28-2013, 10:07 PM   #20
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Step 1) Join the military

Step 2) Hang out in or near a popular club or university/college while wearing dress uniform

Step 3) Flip a coin to decide which hoochie you wanna take back to the barracks



The sad thing is....everything I mentioned isn't even a joke.
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Old 01-28-2013, 10:41 PM   #21
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1) Meeting people through School/College/University
Often good because you are likely to find people with shared interests even if only on an academic level. Possibly creepy if you are attending clown college.


2) Meeting people at the workplace
Depends on the workplace. Not do great if your bosses and/or HR department are running scared of harassment suits. Workplace relationships often suck because you never get time away from your partner and if the relationship goes sour you get to glare at each other until someone quits.


3) Meeting people through family and friends
Terrible. Nothing shows you how much your family and friends don't understand you like having them present you with their "perfect" match. Usually they are just pawning off one of their friend's relatives who either can't find a date or dates people they hate. The person will either hate you because their relatives like you or they will become obsessed with you and sleep in a nest made of your hair clippings that they harvested while you slept.


4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
Mixed leaning towards terrible. Bar dates are almost exclusively good for finding dates that will be great for more hanging out at the bars drinking or with friends drinking. Once some more drinking is to be had, some drinking sex will happen with all the forethought that a night of drinking will allow and soon a baby is in the way (assuming a standard M/F hookup). If lucky, that doesn't happen and you hang out drinking for years until you each find someone better to drink with.


5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
Better than you would think (if you use a reputable dating site). In a busy world, it is nice to narrow the search to a person that is mildly compatible with you. You can talk and ultimately meet and if it doesn't work out you haven't wasted a lot if time or money and/or alienated people from options 2 and 3.


Option 6 involves roofie-coladas and a big, burlap sack but can be easily combined with 4 or 5.
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Old 01-28-2013, 11:05 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fvkasm2x View Post
People who say it IS hard, have something "wrong" with them.
At no point did I ever say it was hard to meet people in real life. I said it can be hard to meet people who have all of the things you're looking for in a person, but I didn't say that it's hard to meet anyone. It is just simply another way of meeting people, and I don't get why you can't understand that. You keep going on about people who use it having something "wrong" with them when everyone has something wrong with them whether they use online dating or not.

Quote:
Meeting people online is for lazy people who don't want to make the effort and who are afraid of rejection. It's much easier to have your emails ignored than it is for a woman to tell you to piss off to your face.
People who have a fear of rejection aren't limited to being rejected to their face. It's actually putting yourself out there in any form that is the actual fear of being rejected.

I feel like this is all wasted effort and I'm gonna get a reply of, "hey bro it's just my opinion, but everyone who uses online dating is a weird, ugly loser" and some more humble bragging.

All this being said, I don't use online dating. I just find it so weird that people who have never tried something get to call everyone else a loser from the outside looking in.
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Old 01-28-2013, 11:27 PM   #23
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Quote:
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People who say it IS hard, have something "wrong" with them. Maybe they aren't confident enough. Maybe they're into stuff that most people of the opposite sex aren't. Maybe they dress like imbeciles.

They could be nice, honest, caring, awesome people... but they have 1 thing that makes them a bit socially awkward. Meeting people online is for lazy people who don't want to make the effort and who are afraid of rejection. It's much easier to have your emails ignored than it is for a woman to tell you to piss off to your face.
You've no idea what you're talking about and you really come across as a douche with your replies. People have something wrong with them because they can't/don't go about doing something the same way you do?
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Old 01-29-2013, 12:24 AM   #24
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Getting difficult to ignore the clusterfuck in the middle to see what hasn't already been said, so forgive me if I repeat others. Don't have the time to invest in picking a fight.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JenniferGenGamer View Post
Guys and girls?

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
2) Meeting people at the workplace
3) Meeting people through family and friends
4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

According to an article on the Guardian newspaper site, these were the most popular and successful ways people used to meet and date new people.

Personally for me, all of these have worked except for the workplace.
Success depends on goals. You could probably get laid by any one of these choices, and I'm assuming that's what The Guardian sees as "success". However, a long term relationship that actually leads to something is rare in most cases. My experience with college and night clubs pretty much amounts to people just wanting to get laid, or be seen with someone attractive. It's not the only situation, but it was definitely more common than people that were looking for a long term relationship.

I never met anyone through family. That would just be weird. Most people my family would have recommended would have been family friends. Crosses a bunch of boundaries.

Workplace doesn't make sense to me, but then again, I'm in a different mode when I'm at a job for someone else. I've never thought of it as a preferable choice, or even a last-ditch one. I wanted to keep my work life as far away as possible from my personal life. That's just me, though. I'm not sure I'd want to hear other people air out their bullshit home-drama about who didn't take out the garbage at work, though.

Internet is a 50/50. There's creepers for both sexes, but that goes without saying. I've had my fair share of stalkers following my trail and buying me shit and figuring out where I work, but I've also met normal people.

Honestly, most of the time a successful relationship will fall in your lap so long as you have some social outlet for doing what you love. Worked for me after wading through so much garbage.
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Old 01-29-2013, 12:24 AM   #25
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1) Meeting people through School/College/University
2) Meeting people at the workplace
3) Meeting people through family and friends
4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
Girl here.

1. I found the most crazies trying to date people through college/university. Seriously, I had a pretty good record for tolerable people until I started looking local to me through education.

2. Don't shit where you eat.

3. Through family... no. Through friends... only in that I may eventually end up dating a friend. I won't go though "recommendations" though. I know my tastes better than a buddy would. This is especially true since most of my buddies are guys and would usually only recommend me a friend of theirs who can't get laid without their help -___-

4. Good for getting laid. Not good really for finding compatible, proper relationships. Seriously, you can't even hear one another at a club.

5. Online has actually been my best way of meeting decent people - including proper boyfriends (heck, Auburok - who I'm engaged to - just posted here, and online is how we met). There's quite a few psychos on the internet, though, so it can be a bit of a gamble. It's particularly fun when the person you think you really have a fondness for is a completely different person ... or not even the gender you thought they were!
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Old 01-29-2013, 03:53 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JenniferGenGamer View Post
Guys and girls?

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
2) Meeting people at the workplace
3) Meeting people through family and friends
4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

According to an article on the Guardian newspaper site, these were the most popular and successful ways people used to meet and date new people.

Personally for me, all of these have worked except for the workplace.
1. Personally it could work. I dated a couple girls from my College nothing ever went serious but its doable.

2. Last Girlfriend I had I worked with. She quit after a while, still dating at the time she quit. Only girl I ever dated that I met from work. We broke up a month ago still have feelings for her its ruining my mojo

3. Friends yes since they know what I like in a girl and I have plenty of female friends so they have enough friends of there own that I wouldn't mind meeting , Family same as above I have 2 older sisters and most of their friends are hot as f*** so yes.

4. I only go to a bar for one of 2 things. Get drunk or laid not looking for a girlfriend there.

5. Never tried it so no opinion.
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Old 01-29-2013, 04:42 PM   #27
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33yo male here.

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
Dated a girl from my program while in college, we were together for two years and now she's still one of my best friends 14 years later. Although I'm terrible at returning calls.

2) Meeting people at the workplace
From other departments in a big institution, not so bad but can still get weird if you have to work together. Inter-department = FUCK NO! EJECT!!! RUN AWAY!!!!

Though I have to say one of my best friends worked in the same department with his now wife when they first started dating, it's how they met. Then they both moved on to different jobs. But they are more the exception than the rule.

3) Meeting people through family and friends
Have always found meeting through friends the best course. My gf and I met through mutual friends on some group bike rides. Been since July now. Her awesome level is very high. In a group of good friends you can gravitate towards a person, or not, and still have wingman potential.

BUT - intended "setups" and blind dates etc are almost always bound to fail. It's best if people in a group just find each other on their own.

4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
IDiivil put that one perfectly. Depends on what you're looking for and you're tolerance levels for bullshit.

5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites
Nope.
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Old 02-02-2013, 02:25 PM   #28
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JenniferGenGamer View Post
Guys and girls?

1) Meeting people through School/College/University
2) Meeting people at the workplace
3) Meeting people through family and friends
4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs
5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

According to an article on the Guardian newspaper site, these were the most popular and successful ways people used to meet and date new people.

Personally for me, all of these have worked except for the workplace.
Okay, I'm one of those sad individuals who has never even gotten as far as a date with a female (just don't). But I'd still be happy to give me 2 cents.

1)I went to an all boys boarding school so that wasn't an option. Went to a mixed college for 2 years but alienated myself so much that I didn't have a single conversation whilst I was there.

2)This is the only place I interact with females my own age and the only place where any potentials have happened (was too timid each time and nothing ever happened). But I would have to agree somewhat with the 'don't sh1t where you eat' saying. If it goes bad then you'll still have to see eachother daily and that could be painful.

3)Family...don't really see how. My family have never discussed females with me or anything sex related so its so unlikely. Friends? TBH I've only really had one friend in years and he did show interest in trying to get me a gf although he never really put anything into motion. If you have no social circle then getting a gf is so much harder as its all down to you.

4)Its ultra rare for me to go to these types of places and I tend to feel somewhat uncomfortable so the chances of me approaching a female and securing any kind of romantic involvement is low.

5) Wow...this tends to be the answer for the socially awkward/shy/anxious types as the nerveracking 'face to face' element is removed and its all about written communication which is what I've become more adept at after so many years of message boards. So this is the only dating avenue I've ever explored and ventured into. Never got any dates but atleast afew females messaged me so it wasn't a total flop. Even I see dating websites as a last resort though as its almost like you're competing with others random guys for the leftovers...depending on which site you go to.

Won't go into detail about why I've never had a gf or date (or anything) at 30 y/o but its mainly due to lifestyle/mindset/personality. Believe me though I do want one so any advice would be appreciated and I am willing to change.
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Old 02-02-2013, 02:55 PM   #29
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1) This is probably a good method, in my opinion.
2) I don't recommend it, especially if it's someone you work with daily. If you change jobs, and then start seeing that person after though, it could work.
3) Family, No. They won't see what you're looking for people they want you to be with, and you'll feel bad for disappointing them if it doesn't work out. Friends, yes. Friends of friends is usually good.
4) Decent place, assuming you go to the right types. You can't assume you'll find the love of your life at a trashy club though.
5) Not personally a fan of this method. It doesn't represent real life well enough, in my opinion. People lie and exaggerate, and have a long time to think of proper responses to please your questions/comments. And you run the risk of meeting up with someone you know nothing about.
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Old 02-02-2013, 06:10 PM   #30
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1) Meeting people through School/College/University

Probably the best way. I know tons of people who met in say, high school, and end up dating through college until they're married (my sister did this).

2) Meeting people at the workplace

Dating someone you work with? Not a good idea.


3) Meeting people through family and friends

Eh, family? No. Through friends? Fair game, I've done that.


4) Meeting people in Pubs/Bars/Nightclubs

No. No. No.


5) Meeting people through online dating/chat sites

Never tried it, never will.
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