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Old 07-24-2013, 12:02 PM   #1
Apparently demoted
jackanape's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: England
Posts: 4,688

Gamertag: jackanape

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Subscriber/Staff Spotlight - July 2013

Hello again peons. No doubt you thought I was dead (or at least wished it, just a little bit) well, sadly, I'm here once again to crush your dreams and make you submit to yet more of my wordy, words. You know that you love it.

Obviously last month was a major coup, what with having Phil Harrison here (aka Kairi, because I like messing with you.......PSYCHOLOGICALLY), so this month I thought I'd give us all a bit more time to relax by just answering ALL the questions myself using either yes/no/yo mama. But even THAT seemed far too taxing so I figured I'd do what we always do and punish one of our more resilient members with my ridiculous questions.


So here for your viewing pleasure we have The Deadly Dog, resident member of the guide team, subscriber and part wolf (with a side order of rabies). Let's hope he's had all of his shots as I really cannot afford another trip to the vets.........

Welcome to the spotlight! Introduce yourself and tell us a little bit about yourself. (THIS IS A QUESTION - don't ignore it like Shinobi did. That devil man.)

Just wanted to start out by thanking the roll of the dice over at for coupling this honor (Editors note: I love how people think this is a reward. YOU FOOLS!) with the month of my birth as the competition was stiff. My name is Geoff (pronounced Jeff) and pronounced by anyone who knows me as Ge-off or as Mr. Tucker called me in 11th grade AP English… Godfree. Most people know me as Dog, Deadly, TDD, or any combination or lack-there-of consisting of my name; although I haven’t heard anyone call me THE DEADLY DOG in full since probably my Socom days oddly enough. I’m rambling, apologies although it’ll happen throughout this entire interview. A little bit about myself?

I’ve been playing video juegos (Editors note: this means games, kids. See we're learning stuff and being entertained. IT'S A TWO FER!) for as long as I can remember. I vaguely recall and am told about the days sitting on my dad’s lap playing on a green monitor pushing the buttons that came up on the screen. That began my love-addiction to games and electronics that has only grown and become a more important part of my life as the years progressed. I think one of the most memorable things people note about me is the fact that I am a full blown nerd who loves to weightlifting, run, exercise, and is perusing a career in law enforcement. There is nothing better than working out and seeing the looks on people’s faces when I’m out squatting, out pressing, or out running a meathead in the gym with a Justice League shirt on. I still haven’t decided what the girls say when they look over and whisper, but I’m assuming it’s pure confusion.

Before we go any further I have to point out that you are a Park Ranger. All I can now think of is you chasing Yogi Bear around in order to make him cease and desist with all that picnic basket theft. that what you do? Be honest (don't kill my dreams though).

Ahh the best way I can describe it is with Smokey the Bear. The people stateside should know who he is, although I’m unsure if the folks across the pond know of him. Nice bear, class act. I could let you fish around for an answer as to what I do, but first you need to have a permit and a fishing license in the state of New York otherwise we will have a problem. I’ll check those credentials now. But what do I do? Essentially it’s policing and security of the park grounds and the patrons of our parks. I have no set list of things I am to do as it literally varies day-to-day depending on what’s going on. Some days I am writing notices for failure to pay the parking rate, other days I’m dealing with uncooperative patrons not listening to park staff, or even dealing with 16 missing children in a four day period (July 4-July 8).

Funniest way my job has been described to me was by a smart 10 year old who said; “Mr. Ranger you make sure we are all safe, but if we do something bad you make sure we go bye-bye.” I don’t make anyone go “bye-bye,” but I do help them find the exit to the park just fine, haha (Editors note: In my mind this is accomplished with a huge catapult).

I'm assuming part of you reason for being a Park Ranger is down to a love of animals (going by your sig). Is that the case or was there another reason entirely?

Originally I got the job as a summer gig to pay for tuition bills (which over here are enough to castrate an entire herd of buffalo). At the end of the summer my park supervisor asked me if I would be willing to stay on after all other rangers got laid off for the summer (the job is technically seasonal). I took the hit in pay and hours to stay on doing something that I began to love and now want to make my profession. My primary park is actually the world’s largest pedestrian bridge over water (, (extra side note, if you ever come on over this way be sure to stop by and introduce yourself). For my first two years I dealt with one animal event (incidents which are recorded and submitted to the state) in which we rescued a dog someone chained to a tree on the other side of the park. Unfortunately for the animal lovers among us, or those who think Park Rangers are lost in the woods all the time, the only animals I saw a majority of my shift are the people that swarm from New York City that subsequently desolate our nice parks so I suppose it depends on what type of animal we are referring to.

You also have a love of history. That covers, well, a LOT. So are we talking specific periods of time?

History has always been the one subject of academia that I have never had a problem with. I gobble it all up and then churn it out like a machine in every facet of my life, and much to my family’s’ dismay, at nauseating levels that make them wonder where all the information goes. Funny side note, and something I hear often, is that I have a huge head. During my football years I had to have a helmet custom made because I didn’t fit into the XL ones so I guess the jokes about it all being stored up in my big head are justified ha (Editors note: Holy crap, ME TOO. We could be related. I have yet to find a hat that fits my big old noggin. It's my secret shame). Specific periods of time though?! That’s like asking a music/movie/game buff to tell you what their favorite song/movie/game is. Blasphemy.

I favor military history, the American Civil War, Greek Mythology, and WWII, to name but a few of my focuses. There is very little history I cannot get into and cannot absorb, although if I have to throw one section, or rather style of teaching history, it would have to be teaching a class with such a bias that you avoid complete aspects of the past to prove a point.

Keeping with that historical bent, if there was any era or location you could live in, explore and learn more about, when/where would that be?

But there are so many to choose from… why just one?! Man that’s like getting teeth implants (they drill into your jaw-bone by the way). Honestly I would go back to the American Civil War. I wish I could live through the drama, the emotions, and the momentous swings that defined the United States. I also wish I could hear the Rebel Yell first hand although my Civil War teacher my senior year did a Rebel Yell so well it sent shivers down my spine so I could only imagine in a full charge what it would feel like.

Back on topic. How did you come up with your gamertag?

Wait.. we were off topic that whole time? Rut ro. (Editors note: I'm always off topic, but we SHOULD talk about games I guess)

For Christmas I got a PS2 and a copy of the game I had spent tons of hours playing at my friend’s house, Socom II: U.S. Navy Seals. I was so excited I ran into the study and put everything together to get on and start playing ASAP. Unintentionally I stirred up the unbeknownst puppy that was sleeping in the hallway. He didn’t rear his head in the room until I was thoroughly stumped on what I should call myself. I had no idea; 16 characters, any order, any symbols, no restrictions aside from curse words, back when you really could make your user unique. Needless to say ignoring the puppy was a bad idea as he now pulled on my shirt trying to get my attention. I shooed him away and literally said “Cody you’re such a deadly dog” and that’s when it dawned on me. THE-DEADLY-DOG. That was in 2004 and it has been my handle ever since for everything from Runescape to x360a to the thousands of hours spend on Socom.

Last edited by jackanape; 07-24-2013 at 12:32 PM.
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