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Old 07-15-2009, 04:03 PM   #1
tastefulmrship
 
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
*SPOILERS* Achievement Walkthrough *SPOILERS*

As requested, here is my AchWalk for Monkey Island:SE. Now, due to the game's achievements being known only as we've played through it, I cannot guarantee this is 100%; if you find anything wrong then PLEASE tell me and I will endeavour to correct it!

Make sure you skip ALL cutscenes (hold Y) and as many conversations as you can. This helps a lot when going for the HUMAN CANNONBALL achievement.

As before, I'd recommend PRINTING THIS OUT and ticking off each line as you finish them! SAVE OFTEN and in different slots... blah... blah... blah... you all know the deal by now!

EDIT: I have 'sped' the walkthrough up a LOT by removing most of the useless conversations. I REALLY recommend you play through it on your own first (there are two other walkthroughs on this site already!) and use this one to speed-run the second playthrough!

EDIT2: The rowboat section (Part Three, Monkey IslandTM) can be an arse! When clicking on an edge, try to click on the water near the land. If Guybrush is rowing slowly, you've clicked on the WRONG place... keep trying around that area until he rows quicker. This also applies to when he's running around Monkey IslandTM. You'll soon work out where the best place is!

EDIT3: I've just run through this walkthrough with one of my alternate accounts and it seems 100% to me! The account got all 12 achievements in the correct order and in 2hrs 41mins! That's both playthroughs! (First achievement at 9:11am, the last at 11:52am)

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 07-16-2009 at 02:58 PM. Reason: Added notes for various stuff.
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:03 PM   #2
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Part One - The Three Trials

Press [BACK] on the X360 controller. (Old School 1/1)

Walk to the right. (To the first building after the boardwalk. It'll have a sign saying SCUMM Bar)
Open door. (Door to the SCUMM Bar)
Walk to door. (Walk into the SCUMM Bar)
Walk to curtain. (To the right of the room)
Open door. (The kitchen door to the right)
Walk to important-looking pirates. (To the left of the table)
Wait for the cook to leave the kitchen and disappear behind the curtain to the left.
Walk to door. (Kitchen door)
Pick up hunk of meat.
Pick up pot. (Under the table)
Open door. (To the jetty)
Walk to the bottom right plank of the pier. (This sends the seagull™ flying. Do this three times to send him flying further, giving you just enough time to get the fish he's guarding (To make things easier, make sure PICK UP is your secondary action; ie, the B button)
Pick up fish.
Walk to door. (Out of the kitchen)
Walk to curtain.
Walk to door. (Out of the SCUMM Bar)
Walk to cliffside. (All the way to the left, where you came in after the intro sequence)
Walk to path. (Under the big archway)

Click on CLEARING. (Above and to the right of the VILLAGE, near the centre of the map)
Walk to circus tent. (Walk left until it appears)
- <pick any response from the list>
- "How much will you pay me?"
- "OK, sounds good."
- "Of course I have a helmet. What sort of idiot do you take me for?"
Give pot to Fettucini Brothers.
- <pick any response from the list>
Walk to path. (To the right)

Click on VILLAGE. (To the left, where you started from. If you accidentally click on LOOKOUT POINT instead of VILLAGE, then just walk downwards to the docks)
Walk to archway. (Head right, past the SCUMM Bar)
Walk to archway. (To the left, under the clocktower)
Open door. (The first building, on the right)
Walk to door.
Pick up sword. (It's on the shelf, right of the stairs to the upper deck)
Pick up shovel. (Left of the vault, upper deck)
Talk to storekeeper.
- "About this sword..."
- "I want it."
- "About this shovel..."
- "I want it."
- "I think I'd just like to browse."
Walk to door. (Out of the store)
Walk to archway. (To the right)
Walk to archway. (To the right)
Walk to cliffside.
Walk to path.

Click on HOUSE. (It's at the bottom right of the map)
Give fish to troll.

Click on HOUSE.
Open door. (To the house)
- "Could you make me the best swordfighter on Melee™?"
- "I do so have what it takes!"
- "I do so!"
- "I do so!"
- "I've got 30 pieces of eight."
- "OK, check it out."
- <Pick any response from the list>
- <Pick any response from the list>
Walk to path. (To the left)
**** SAVE GAME WHEN YOU'VE GOT 12 INSULTS ****
Sometimes Insult Swordfighting can take ages! Play through first until you get 12 insults, then save and get the other 4 insults & responses! Reload, then battle Carla! This will save you time when going for the HUMAN CANNONBALL achievement.
On the map, head to the sideways T-junction just above and to the left of the VILLAGE, left of FORK, where the wandering pirates convirge. It's easier to wait for them to attack you, than you chasing them around.
- "My name is Guybrush Threepwood. Prepare to die!"
Compete in Insult Swordfighting. (See guide below) (Sharp Tongue 1/1)

Click on VILLAGE.
Walk to archway.
Walk to archway.
Walk to door. (The store, to the right)
Talk to storekeeper.
- "I'm looking for the Sword Master of Melee Island™."
This section needs to be done as quickly as possible; if you lose sight of the storekeeper you will have to go back to the store, ring the bell and ask him to trek to the Sword Master's secret hideout again. You cannot get through the forest without his help!
Open door.
Walk to door.
Walk to archway.
Walk to archway.
Walk to cliffside.
Walk to path.

Click on FORK. (It's between the VILLAGE and the CLEARING, just above the VILLAGE.)
Keep a note of which pathway the storekeeper takes.
Walk to path. (To the back, lefthand path)
Pick up yellow plants.
Walk to path. (To the back, righthand path)
Walk to path. (To the right)
Walk to path. (To the right, past the red plants)
Walk to path. (To the left)
Walk to path. (To the back)
Walk to path. (To the right, over the bridge)
Talk to Sword Master. (To the right, infront of the house)
- "My name is Guybrush Threepwood. I've come to kill you."
Compete in Insult Swordfighting with Carla. (See guide below) (The Three Trials 1/5)
Walk to path. (To the left, over the wooden bridge)

Click on the VILLAGE.
Walk to archway.
Walk to archway.
Walk to doorway. (Left building)
Talk to prisoner.
Walk to doorway.
Open door. (Of the store, if closed)
Walk to door. (Of the store, righthand building)
Talk to storekeeper.
- "I could really use a breath mint."
- "I think I'd just like to browse."
Walk to door.
Walk to doorway.
Give breath mints to prisoner.
If you skip the next bit, use '- "Well, keep a stiff upper lip. I've gotto go."'
- "Sheriff Shinetop sure is a jerk, isn't he?"
- "He seems innocent to me. Why don't you let him out?"
Walk to doorway.
Walk to archway. (To the left)
Walk to Governor's mansion.
Use yellow petal with hunk of meat.
Use meat with condiment with deadly piranha poodles.
Open door.
Walk to door.
Open door. (The glass door to the right of the entrance)
Walk to door.
Walk to door. (The entrance)
Walk to trail. (Right of the mansion)
Walk to town.
Walk to doorway.
Give gopher repellent to prisoner.
Walk to doorway.
Walk to archway. (To the left)
Walk to Governor's mansion.
Walk to door.
Open cake.
Walk to gaping hole.
- <pick any response from the list>
- <pick any response from the list>
Open door. (Entrance door)
- <pick any response from the list>
***** SAVE GAME *****
Wait for Guybrush to drown. (Ten Minutes Later... 1/1)
Guybrush will die after ten minutes real time! You cannot continue & so you HAVE to reload!
***** LOAD GAME *****
Pick up fabulous idol. (The Three Trials 2/5)
Walk to dock.
Walk to cliffside.
Walk to path.

Click on FORK.
Walk to path. (To the back, righthand path)
Walk to path. (To the left)
Walk to path. (To the right, past the campsite)
Walk to path. (To the left, past the plant and stump)
Walk to path. (To the right)
Walk to path. (To the back, past the famous stump joke)
Walk to path. (To the right, past the rock and plant)
Walk to path. (To the left)
Walk to path. (To the back)
Use shovel with X. (Walk to the right) (The Three Trials 3/5)
Walk to forest path. (Walk to the left, where you came in)

Click on VILLAGE.
- "I'll go get a crew and a ship and go rescue her!"
Walk to dock.
Walk to cliffside.
Walk to path.

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 07-09-2010 at 10:45 AM. Reason: Removed 90% of the conversations... this will knock a good 20 mins of the time!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:05 PM   #3
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Part One - The Three Trials - Parts 4 & 5

Click on LIGHTS. (Between the VILLAGE and the HOUSE)
- "I really don't have that much to spend."
- "Actually, I was hoping to get one on credit."
- "On second thought, this may not be the ship for me."
- "Actually, I'd like to go think about it some more."

Click on VILLAGE.
Walk to archway.
Walk to archway.
Walk to door. (To the store)
Use bell. (If storekeeper is not there!)
- "I'm interested in procuring a note of credit."
- "Yes, of course I do."
Make a note of the combination to the vault. (It's always, anti-clockwise, clockwise, anti-clockwise, clockwise, but the combination changes for each game)
- <pick any response from the list>
The storekeeper will show you the combination again, so make sure your notes are correct.
- "I'm looking for the Sword Master of Melee Island™."
Walk to handle. (On the vault, upper deck)
Pull handle. (Until the handle is in the first position)
Push handle. (Until the handle is in the second position)
Pull handle. (Until the handle is in the third position)
Push handle. (Until the handle is in the fourth position)
Open door.
Walk to door.
Walk to archway.
Walk to archway.
Walk to cliffside.
Walk to path.

Click on USED SHIP EMPORIUM. (The location previously known as LIGHTS)
- "Uh... could I see that cheap one again?"
- "I got credit from the storekeeper. Will you take it?"
- "Well, what do you think it's worth?"
- "Let's talk extras."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "I think I can live without that particular piece of junk."
- "Enough about extras, already."
- "Forget it. I don't need this boat anyway."
- "Well, maybe you're right..."
- "Well, what do you think it's worth?"
- "I'd like to make you an offer."
- "All right! 5000! But that's my final offer!" (The Three Trials 4/5)
Walk to path. (To the left)

Click on VILLAGE.
Walk to door. (To the SCUMM Bar)
Pick up mug. (On the table to the right of the door)
Pick up mug. (On the table next to the curtain)
Pick up mug. (On the table in the middle of the bar)
Walk to curtain.
Pick up mug. (To the left of the cook)
Pick up mug. (To the right of the cook)
Open door. (To the kitchen)
Walk to door.
This next section is a nightmare! Make sure you have your D-Pad ready on the TOP-RIGHT corner (USE) to change the mugs over! You should SAVE the game here & reload if you make a mistake getting to the prison.
Use mug with barrel.
Walk to door.
Walk to curtain.
Walk to door. (Out of the SCUMM Bar)
Walk to archway.
Use mug with melting mug. (Do this as soon as you regain control of Guybrush)
Walk to archway.
Walk to doorway.
Use mug with melting mug. (Do this as soon as you regain control of Guybrush)
Use mug o' grog with lock. (Or melting mug, depending on your speed using the verb table)
Walk to doorway.
Walk to archway.
Open door. (The door to the left of the Citizen of Melee, right of the clocktower)
Walk to door.
Pick up chicken. (On the table, below the red sofa)
Open door.
Walk to door.
Walk to archway. (To the docks, righthand arch)
Walk to cliffside.
Walk to path.

Click on SWORD MASTER'S. (Above and to the left of the CLEARING, which is now called CIRCUS)
Talk to Sword Master.
- "The Governor's been KIDNAPPED!"
Walk to path.

Click on ISLAND. (Top right corner of the map)
Use chicken on cable.
Open door. (House to the right)
Walk to door.
- "The Governor's been KIDNAPPED!"
- "We could get a crew together and sail off after them."
Open door. (The last door left to open)
Poke murderous winged devil. (Or taunt, fondle, feel, tickle, tap, annoy, prod, stroke, finger, bother or handle... they all work)
Use chicken on cable.
Walk to path.

Click on VILLAGE.
- "Otis! I thought I'd never see you again!"
- "Glad you could make it, Carla." (The Three Trials 5/5)

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 07-09-2010 at 10:45 AM. Reason: Removed a lot of unnecessary actions and conversations! More deleted bits... Thanks to Gor1lla!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:05 PM   #4
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Part Two - The Journey

Pick up feather pen. (Behind Guybrush)
Pick up ink.
Walk to door. (To the left)
Walk to rope ladder. (On the mast)
Pick up Jolly Roger.
Walk to ship deck. (Below Guybrush)
Walk to hatch. (Between Meathook & Otis)
Walk to hatch.
Open kegs. (To the left) (Gunpowder added to inventory)
Pick up giant piece of rope. (Bottom middle)
Open chest. (Bottom righthand corner)
Look at chest. (Fine wine added to inventory)
Walk to ladder.
Walk to door. (Left of the exit ladder)
Open cupboard. (To the left of the room)
Pick up cereal.
Walk to ladder. (To the left of the room)
Walk to ladder.
Walk to door. (To the captain's cabin)
Open cereal.
Look at prize.
Use small key in cabinet. (To the right of the room)
Open chest.
Look at chest. (Note and cinnamon sticks added to inventory)
Walk to door.
Walk to hatch.
Walk to door.
Use cinnamon sticks with cooking pot.
Use cereal with cooking pot.
Use Jolly Roger with cooking pot.
Use ink with cooking pot.
Use fine wine with cooking pot.
Use rubber chicken on cooking pot.
Use gunpowder with cooking pot.
Use breath mints with cooking pot.

Click anywhere to wake Guybrush up.
Use feather pen with red hot fire. (Under the cooking pot)
Pick up pot. (On the bench under the cereal cupboard)
Walk to ladder.
Walk to hatch.
Open kegs.
Walk to ladder.
Walk to ladder.
Use gunpowder in cannon nozzle. (Above Guybrush. Thanks to Lunco for making this infinitely easier than it was!)
Use giant piece of rope with cannon.
Use pot. (The Journey 1/1)

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 01-01-2011 at 08:48 AM. Reason: Kegs, gunpowder, mistakes, corrections, erasions! Thanks to Lunco! More deleted bits. Thanks to Gor1lla! Recipe items confusion added!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:06 PM   #5
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Part Three - Under Monkey Island

Click anywhere to wake Guybrush up.
Look at piece of paper. (Recordkeeper 1/9)
Pick up banana.
Walk to jungle.
Click the top left edge of the map until it changes.

Click on BEACH. (Below the volcano)
Pick up note. (Recordkeeper 2/9)
- "Leave me alone, would you?"
Walk to jungle

Click on Fort. (Top section of the volcano crater)
Pick up spyglass.
Pick up rope.
Push cannon.
- "Leave me alone, would you?"
Pick up gunpowder.
Pick up cannon ball.
Walk to path.
Click the right edge of the map until it changes again.

Click on RIVER FORK. (Near the centre of the map)
Pick up note under rock. (Recordkeeper 3/9)
Look at noteworthy rock. (You pick this up as well as the note, so it will be in your inventory. Thanks to LanEvo)
Walk to footholds.
Pick up note. (Recordkeeper 4/9)
***** SAVE GAME HERE *****
You will have to miss the next section (in blue) once you've completed the game for the first time. This is to ensure that you DO NOT sink the SEA MONKEY on your second playthrough, which means your crew are not stranded on MONKEY ISLAND. Reload this game to continue!
Walk to footholds (right of the BIG rock)
Push rock. (In the centre of the cliff)
- "Leave me alone, would you?"
Pick up heap o' rocks.
Walk to path down. (To the left)
Pick up note (Record keeper 5/9) (Not required for the second playthrough)
Pull primitive art.
Pull primitive art. (Sometimes Guybrush PUSHes the PRIMITIVE ART, so keep pulling it until it is facing towards you)
Walk to footholds.
Push rock.
- "Leave me alone, would you?" (This is for the second run-through only!)
Walk to path down.
Walk to path down. (Just below primitive art)
Walk to dam.
Use handful of gunpowder with dam.
Use flint with spyglass.

Click on POND. (At the end of the river, to the right)
Pick up note. (Recordkeeper 6/9) (Not required for the second playthrough)
- "Leave me alone, would you?"
Pick up rope.
Walk to jungle.
Click on the bottom edge of the map.

Click on CRACK. (Above the BEACH)
Use rope with tree. (Infront of Guybrush)
Use rope with sturdy stump. (To the right again)
Pick up oars.
Walk to jungle. (Bottom of the screen)

Click on BEACH.
Pick up bananas.
Use oars with rowboat.
Click the top-right corner of the map.
Click the top edge of the map.

Click on BEACH. (These three actions are not required for the second playthrough, go straight to 'Click on VILLAGE')
Pick up note. (Recordkeeper 7/9)
Walk to jungle.

Click on VILLAGE. (Near the top left corner of the map)
Walk to the left of the village.
Pick up bananas.
Walk to the right of the village.
- "Don't eat me! I'll give you anything!"
Wait until you're captured.
Pick up memo. (Recordkeeper 8/9) (Not required for the second playthrough)
Pick up skull.
Open loose board.
Walk to hole. (Escape Artist 1/5)
You do not need to escape the hut 5 times on your second playthrough, as this will only waste precious time! Go straight to 'Click on BEACH'.

Click on VILLAGE.
Walk left. (To the hut)
Walk right. (To the exit)
- "Don't eat me! I'll give you anything!"
Wait until you're captured... again!
Walk to hole.
Repeat this previous section (in red) three more times. (Escape Artist 5/5)

Click on BEACH.
Walk to rowboat and oars.
Click on the bottom right corner of the map.
Click on the bottom edge of the map.

Click on BEACH.
Walk to jungle.

Click on MONKEY. (He's between the BEACH and CRACK. He keeps moving around and is pretty difficult to see)
Give banana to monkey.
Give banana to monkey.
Give banana to monkey.
Give banana to monkey.
Give banana to monkey.
Walk to jungle.
Click on the top edge of the map.
Click on the right edge of the map.

Click on BEACH. (These three actions are not required for the second playthrough, go straight to 'Click on CLEARING')
Pick up bottle. (Recordkeeper 9/9)
Walk to jungle.

Click on CLEARING. (Right of the beach)
Walk right, past the skulls.
Pull nose. (Of the lefthand totem pole. The nose is the middle one)
Walk away from the totem pole. (Click anywhere around the screen)
Walk to gigantic monkey head.
Pick up wimpy little idol.
Walk to monkey grounds. (Walk left)
Walk to jungle. (Walk left, past the skulls)
Click on the left edge of the map.
Click on the bottom edge of the map.

Click on BEACH.
Walk to rowboat and oars.
Click on the top right corner of the map.
Click on the top edge of the map.

Click on BEACH.
Walk to jungle.

Click on VILLAGE.
Walk left, past the hut.
Walk right, to the exit.
- "Don't eat me, I'll give you anything!"
Give wimpy little idol to cannibals.
Walk to door. (Of the hut to the left)
Pick up banana picker.
Walk to door.
Walk right, towards the exit.
Give banana picker to Herman Toothrot.
Walk to jungle.

Click on VILLAGE.
- "Well, actually, there is something..."
- "I'm looking for somebody."
- "That's okay. The people I'm looking for aren't living."
- "So why don't you do that now?"
- "Where is he hiding it?"
- "I'm off to find LeChuck and get the root!"
- "What's the Eadhay of the Avigatornay?"
Give leaflet to friendly natives.
Walk to jungle.

Click on BEACH.
Walk to rowboat and oars.
Click on the bottom edge of the map.
Click on the bottom edge of the map.

Click on BEACH.
Walk to jungle.
Click on the top edge of the map.
Click on the right edge of the map.

Click on CLEARING.
Walk right, past the skulls.
Walk to gigantic monkey head.
Use monkey head key in gigantic monkey ear.
Walk to gigantic monkey head.

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 10-19-2010 at 07:31 AM. Reason: Added three more notes to RECORD KEEPER. Noteworthy rock confusion resolved; thanks to LanEvo.
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:07 PM   #6
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Part Three - Under Monkey Island - The Actually Under Monkey Island Bit!

Walk right. (All the way until you get to the cave door)
Walk to cave,
Use head of the navigator.
The head will show you which direction to go. Stop infront of any caves or forks in the path so you can see which one is correct. Just follow his directions for a few areas and you'll end up next to the ghost ship.
Talk to head of the navigator.
- "May I please have that necklace?"
- "Maybe I'll just take it..."
- "I don't want to have to hurt you..."
- "What're you going to do? Bite me?"
- "If I wanted to I could dropkick you into the lava."
Use necklace on navigator.
Walk to ghost ship.
Open door. (To the left, past the ghost dog)
Walk to door.
Use magnetic compass with key.
Walk to door.
Walk to hatch. (Right of ghost pirates)
Walk to passage. (To the right)
Pick up ghost feather. (Left of the right-hand ghost chicken)
Walk to passage.
Use ghost feather with sleeping ghost crew. (Use it on his feet)
Use ghost feather with sleeping ghost crew. (Use it on his feet again)
Pick up jug o'grog.
Walk to passage.
Use key in hatch.
Walk to hatch.
Use jug o'grog with dish.
Pick up cooking grease.
Walk to ladder.
Walk to passage.
Walk to ladder.
Use glob of grease on door. (The righthand door)
Open door.
Walk to door.
Pick up ghost tools. (Right of sleeping guard)
Walk to door.
Walk to hatch.
Walk to passage.
Use ghost tools with glowing crate. (Above ghost pigs)
Look at glowing crate.
Walk to passage.
Walk to ladder.
Walk to cave.
Walk to cave. (Left side of the screen)
- <pick any response from the list>
Walk to jungle.
- "Have a taste of root beer you evil spirit."
- "Tell me where the ghost ship is."
- "OK, I promise."
- "Where is the wedding?"
- "I've got to go after them!"
- "Will you take me to Melee Island™?" (Under Monkey Island 1/1)
- "We've got to get back to Melee Island™!" (This is for the second playthrough only!)

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 07-09-2010 at 10:47 AM. Reason: Made sure all was tip-top!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:08 PM   #7
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Last Part - Guybrush Kicks Butt

Walk to dock.
- <pick any response from the list>
Walk to dock.
Use magic seltzer bottle with grim spectre.
Walk to archway.
Open door. (The middle building)
Walk to door.
- <pick any response from the list>
- <pick any response from the list>
- "If you're here, then who's in that dress?"
- <pick any response from the list>
If LeChuck punches you before you can get the root beer or use the root beer, then wait for Guybrush to land and try again. (LeChuck will repeatedly punch you until you defeat him)
Pick up root beer.
Use root beer with LeChuck.
- "Sure."
- <pick any response from the list> (Guybrush Kicks Butt 1/1) (Determined 1/1) (Human Cannonball 1/1) (Marooned Everyone 1/2)

Now, reload the SAVEGAME you saved at the PRIMITIVE ART section and continue from there. (Marooned Everyone 2/2)

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 07-09-2010 at 10:48 AM. Reason: Moved MAROONED EVERYONE off the final action; it was confusing!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:09 PM   #8
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Sarone T C's Gamercard
-- Insult Swordfighting guide

This is the longest, and most annoying, part of the whole adventure. The insults you get called, by the pirates, are random and you'll find yourself waiting for the last two or three for quite a while.

The basic rules of Insult Swordfighting;

- Guybrush will insult the pirate. If the pirate fails to comeback with the correct response, Guybrush wins a point and will be able to insult the pirate again. However, if the pirate successfully responds, then he wins the point and gets to insult Guybrush.
- The battle continues until one fighter has won three points.
- Guybrush can only use insults and responses he has been taught in previous battles with the pirates.

As the pirates teach Guybrush insults and responses, cross them off the list below. This makes it easier to use the insults you've been taught, but do not know the corresponding response once the list gets too big to manage manually.

Once you've won four battles, the pirates will say that you're good enough to fight the Sword Master, Carla, but it's best to continue fighting until you've learned all 16 insults and responses. Make sure you save the game once you've learned 12 insults and responses!


Here's a complete list of insults and responses in the order they appear in your dialogue list.

- Insult - This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!
- Response - And I've got a little TIP for you. Get the POINT?

- Insult - Soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab!
- Response - First you'd better stop waving it around like a feather-duster.

- Insult - My handkerchief will wipe up your blood!
- Response - So you got that job as janitor, after all.

- Insult - People fall at my feet when they see me coming.
- Response - Even BEFORE they smell your breath?

- Insult - I once owned a dog that was smarter than you.
- Response - He must have taught you everything you know.

- Insult - You make me want to puke.
- Response - You make me think somebody already did.

- Insult - Nobody's ever drawn blood from me, and nobody ever will!
- Response - You run THAT fast?

- Insult - You fight like a dairy farmer.
- Response - How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

- Insult - I got this scar on my face during a mighty struggle!
- Response - I hope now you've learned to stop picking your nose.

- Insult - Have you stopped wearing diapers yet?
- Response - Why, did you want to borrow one?

- Insult - I've heard you are a contemptible sneak.
- Response - Too bad no one's ever heard of YOU at all.

- Insult - You're no match for my brains, you poor fool.
- Response - I'd be in real trouble if you ever used them.

- Insult - You have the manners of a beggar.
- Response - I wanted to make sure you'd feel comfortable with me.

- Insult - I'm not going to take your insolence sitting down!
- Response - Your hemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh?

- Insult - There are no words for how disgusting you are.
- Response - Yes there are. You just never learned them.

- Insult - I've spoken with apes more polite than you.
- Response - I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion.


Here is a list of insults and responses for the battle with Carla, the Sword Master of Melee Island™. This fight differs from the previous fights as Carla does all the insulting and Guybrush only needs to successfully respond to win a point. You need to win five points to beat Carla.

- Insult - I've got a long, sharp lesson for you to learn today.
- Response - And I've got a little TIP for you. Get the POINT?

- Insult - My tongue is sharper than any sword.
- Response - First, you'd better stop waving it like a feather-duster.

- Insult - My name is feared in every dirty corner of this island!
- Response - So you got that job as a janitor, after all.

- Insult - My wisest enemies run away at the first sight of me!
- Insult - I usually see people like you passed-out on tavern floors.
- Response - Even BEFORE they smell your breath?

- Insult - Only once have I met such a coward!
- Response - He must have taught you everything you know.

- Insult - If your brother's like you, better to marry a pig.
- Response - You make me think somebody already did.

- Insult - No one will ever catch ME fighting as badly as you do.
- Response - You run THAT fast?

- Insult - I will milk every last drop of blood from your body.
- Response - How appropriate, you fight like a cow.

- Insult - My last fight ended with my hands covered with blood.
- Response - I hope now you've learned to stop picking your nose.

- Insult - I hope you have a boat ready for a quick escape.
- Response - Why, did you want to borrow one?

- Insult - My sword is famous all over the Caribbean!
- Response - Too bad no one's ever heard of YOU at all.

- Insult - I've got the courage and skill of a master swordsman!
- Response - I'd be in real trouble if you ever used them.

- Insult - Every word you say to me is stupid.
- Response - I wanted to make sure you'd feel comfortable with me.

- Insult - You are a pain in the backside, sir!
- Response - Your hemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh?

- Insult - There are no clever moves that can help you now.
- Response - Yes there are. You just never learned them.

- Insult - Now I know what filth and stupidity really are.
- Response - I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion.

Last edited by tastefulmrship; 07-16-2009 at 11:11 AM. Reason: Added some stuff... nothing really noteworthy!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:21 PM   #9
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excelent guide... will be using this for my 2nd play when I will do the speed run... the 1st play will be just for the fun of playing this fantastic game after 19 years!
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:41 PM   #10
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I know that i'll be copying all those insults and responses. Thanks for the guide, great job.
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Old 07-15-2009, 04:53 PM   #11
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Many thanks, ill save this for 2nd runthrough also, just about to pop my monkey island cherry!!
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Old 07-15-2009, 05:02 PM   #12
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How do you get Marooned Everyone, exactly? When do you have the chance to change what you get.
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Old 07-15-2009, 05:16 PM   #13
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Quote:
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How do you get Marooned Everyone, exactly? When do you have the chance to change what you get.

see Tastefulmrships 5th post down,halfway through the recordkeeper achievements(after 3/6)

its quite a long way to the end from there,but it seems that there is where you have save it to do both things for the two endings

@Tastefulmrship,thanks for this walkthru,i'm gonna use it on my second runthrough if i decide to take the plunge and try for the speedrun
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Old 07-15-2009, 05:51 PM   #14
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Quote:
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How do you get Marooned Everyone, exactly? When do you have the chance to change what you get.
This one's a real nightmare to explain on paper!

- Ok, play the game until you get to the RIVER FORK (in Part 3) & go up the footholds to the PRIMITIVE ART.
- *** SAVE GAME NOW! ****
- Now go up and push the rock (to sink the SEA MONKEY)... complete the game. (About 45 minutes from here)
- Reload the game.
- This time move the PRIMITIVE ART to the position so you can hit the banana tree instead of the SEA MONKEY... complete the game.
- Achievement unlocked.

Your first finish will show CARLA, MEATHOOK & OTIS marooned on Monkey Island.
Your second will show HERMAN TOOTHROT marooned on Monkey Island.
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Old 07-15-2009, 05:52 PM   #15
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Thanks for the great guide, will be used for a speed-run
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Old 07-15-2009, 05:54 PM   #16
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Man...I picked up all the notes (even a mysterious 7th one) and I didn't get the Achievement. Maybe I have to read the bulletin on the first beach.

EDIT: The note in the bottle counts towards Recordkeeper.
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Old 07-15-2009, 08:53 PM   #17
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thanks for this

i used it for my speed run incase i had forgotten anything from my earlier play through een though it was only this morning i played it.
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Old 07-16-2009, 05:46 AM   #18
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Thanks for the third guide, seeing that I have already used your other two.
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Old 07-16-2009, 07:07 AM   #19
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All I can say is 'SU-F**KING-PERB!'
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Old 07-16-2009, 08:33 AM   #20
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Thx for the guide .. Its been soo long since iv played this thats iv forgotten what to do lol .. but i just read a little bit of the guide and im no long stuck! =)
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Old 07-16-2009, 09:28 AM   #21
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Great guide, especially for the insults. But you recommended people to go to battle Carla when you learned 10 insults (and responses). Well, I did with 10 and I just had the baddest luck that Carla said all the insults I didn't learn and I lost

Well, thank god you mentioned to save the game, so I just have to re-leard a lot of insults and responses.
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Old 07-16-2009, 11:06 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BonkMeisterXXL View Post
Great guide, especially for the insults. But you recommended people to go to battle Carla when you learned 10 insults (and responses). Well, I did with 10 and I just had the baddest luck that Carla said all the insults I didn't learn and I lost
I'd recommend 12 insults and responses, as it's as near to 75% as you're gonna get without being 75% exactly! (Afterall 12/16 is close enough to get 5 points off Carla!)

Also, I've just finished checking the walkthrough (with an alternate account) and it took me 1hr 28mins to finish the game, so you could probably learn all 16 and still have plenty of time left for the HUMAN CANNONBALL achievement.

Finally, I had a few insults from CARLA that I'd never seen before. If you find any that are not on my list, please PM me & I'll add them to the list!
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Old 07-16-2009, 12:05 PM   #23
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When launching from the ship, you don't have to use flaming mass and pot. Just use pot and Gybrush will do it all by himself.
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Old 07-16-2009, 12:42 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lunco View Post
When launching from the ship, you don't have to use flaming mass and pot. Just use pot and Gybrush will do it all by himself.
Indeed, thanks for that! Makes that section MUCH easier!
Added to the walkthrough.


--------------------------------------------------------

I know I've added stuff from other people; if you can see ideas you've suggested and I've not credited, then please PM me and I'll make sure you're properly credited for your brilliance!
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Old 07-16-2009, 08:15 PM   #25
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Man I love these guides. They make finishing these type of games so much easier to do. Thank you Tastefulmrship
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Old 07-17-2009, 01:54 AM   #26
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You know you can use the flint with the magnetic compass to make a spark. I've never seen anyone say that but it's true... that's how I just did it.
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Old 07-17-2009, 02:43 AM   #27
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Do certain pirates give different insults? I've been insult sword fighting for 40 minutes and I can't get the last one for the achievement. I'm just missing the one about the scar...

*edit

Ahh... should really read through all the way, sorry. Random insults... T_T

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Old 07-17-2009, 10:22 AM   #28
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tastefulmrship View Post
Also, I've just finished checking the walkthrough (with an alternate account) and it took me 1hr 28mins to finish the game
Damn man.

I'm playing this game for the very first time and I just finished Part 1 at 1hr 18 minutes :P

Does pausing the game make the timer stop? Cause I've chatted for maybe like an half an hour when I was playing yesterday, but I paused the screen first.
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Old 07-17-2009, 10:23 AM   #29
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If anyone could help us quick ..?

Iv read the guide but im stuck on trying to get into the mansion. I have the meat and yellow flowers etc but everytime I throw the meat it wont let me move past the dogs .. plus it says the dogs wont like the flowers, so I cant use that on them?? I obviouly doing something wrong but I dont get what!

Thx for any help in advance!
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Old 07-17-2009, 10:32 AM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mnorsworthy View Post
Iv read the guide but im stuck on trying to get into the mansion. I have the meat and yellow flowers etc but everytime I throw the meat it wont let me move past the dogs .. plus it says the dogs wont like the flowers, so I cant use that on them?? I obviouly doing something wrong but I dont get what!
I believe this is the section you need...

...
Walk to doorway.
Walk to archway. (To the left)
Walk to Governor's mansion.
Use yellow petal with hunk of meat.
Use meat with condiment with deadly piranha poodles.
Open door.
...
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