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About pewdiepie

  • Birthday 04/12/1985

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  1. Okay, so I know there has been glitches where kids turn out a different color, but this time was interesting, to say the least. I came upon the Demon Door that asked me and someone to create something, so obviously he meant go drag a floozy into my royal castle and pound her till she poops out a kid. So I was wandering around Bowerstone Industrial looking for keys and this wench whom I've never seen before comes up to me and professes her love. I said f*** it and popped the question. She gracefully accepted and we had a grand olde time having a wedding with all the yuppies in the castle. Right after, she couldn't stop telling me how 'moist' her downstairs was, so I dragged the lady of the evening to the royal chamber and smashed dat ass - unprotected of course. Whaddaya know, she dropped a little bastard out. I held the kid, cradled him in my arms, and put him to sleep - forever. Muahhahahaha. Just kidding, it was just for the night. Well the kid was white, since myself and wife are. I left town for a few days to gather keys, and came back to give the little guy a teddy bear or something. He had somehow grown to be about 4 years old or so, and was still white. I realized I had never named the thing, so I did. Now I'm not a racist, but I named him 'the N word' for shits and giggles. After, I ventured out somewhere, and ended up idling in an alley while I went to make dinner, raking in the dough (that's money for you non-criminals). Came back about an hour later, and traveled back to the castle. Walk into the foyer, and this little black kid comes walking down the stairs, right at me. He runs up to me and says "Daddy, I'm 6! That's 2 more than 4!" I shit myself and my mind became mashed potatoes, wondering how the hell my kid just turned black after naming him N*gger. Mind boggled, I dragged my wench of a wife into the sewers and stabbed this shit out her, just after lighting her on fire. While leaving her to bleed to death, I snatched up the little shit of a kid, and dragged his ass to the orphanage or force him into child labor. Basically, the kid was 4 years old and white, from my white wife and myself, who is also white. I named him 'the N word', and next time I saw him he aged 2 years and changed his pigmentation. Either my dead wife was a hussy and slept around, the little twat got into my dyes, or Lionhead Studios' programmers are racist. I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts on this one.
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