Overview:
- Estimated achievement difficulty: 3/10 [Achievement Difficulty Rating]
- Offline: 39 [1000gs.png]
- Online: 0
- Approximate amount of time to 1000gs.png: 10-15 hours [Estimated Time to 100%]
- Minimum number of playthroughs needed: 1
- Missable achievements: None [open world sandbox]
- Does difficulty affect achievements: No difficulty option
- Unobtainable/glitched achievements: None
 
For questions, comments or feedback, please visit the Achievements and Guide Discussion thread.

Introduction:
Welcome to Goat Simulator 3, the follow up to the quite popular Goat Simulator. If you played the first, the formula here is much the same: an open world sandbox game with intentional ridiculousness and a ton of parodies of other popular games and media. This game has more substance to it than the first, with a whole host of events and ingame challenges to try to complete. Returning are the myriad of collectibles and a ton of miscellaneous achievements (which are also references or parodies). This completion will take a bit more work than the first game, but there's plenty to enjoy along the way. Let's get started. 

Abbreviated Walkthrough:
Unlike the first game, there is actually a very efficient way to tackle this completion. The main reason for that is because you won't be able to do many of the miscellaneous achievements until you rank up your Goat Castle, and you won't be able to do a bunch of the Instincts until you get certain gear from certain Events. On top of that, you can get some gear right away that'll help tremendously with traversal around the map and to get where you need to go quickly. 

Step 1: Sync All Towers and Collect Instincts
The first thing you should do is travel around the map and synchronize the six Goat Towers. This reveals your entire map so you can see all of the Events you'll need to complete. While doing this, there's an Instinct well right by each Tower. Grab those as well, because it'll add Instincts to your list of ingame challenges, and you'll likely be unavoidably completing some in the next steps, so it's better to have them all available right away to start working on. 

Step 2: Get the Glider and Do the Ramps
It might seem odd to do collectibles already, but get the Glider right by the Mornwood Goat Tower, and do the ramps in Daredevil (30G) to unlock the daredevil helmet. These two combined will make it a piece of cake to move around the map quickly and do whatever you need to do, saving you a ton of time overall. 

Step 3: Events
The next thing to do is complete all of those Events marked on your map. You need to do them to rank up your Goat Castle to S, and that needs to happen before you can do many miscellaneous achievements. Many Events also reward you with a new piece of gear, many of which are needed to complete all Instincts. So, go around the map completing all of the Events. Almost all of them are really short and easy, with only a couple being a pain. See a full breakdown in New Goat Order (15G) for how to complete them all. This will take a couple hours but it will unlock almost everything you need. 

Step 4: Miscellaneous Achievements, S Tier, Complete the Story
You may be just short of S Tier from the previous step, so now go through the list of miscellaneous achievements and complete each in the guide below. Doing so will complete a number of secret Events, getting you the last points needed to reach S Tier. Head to the Castle then to open the big door and complete the boss fight. With that done, if you haven't already, go down the achievement list and complete all of the miscellaneous ones. I have screenshots for each one, so they'll be really quick and easy to knock out. 

Step 5: Collectibles
We're nearly done, but now it's time to go around and take care of the collectibles. You should've already done the ramps above, but if not for whatever reason, do them first here for the same reason: the helmet makes it far easier to get around to get the other collectibles. Refer to Daredevil (30G) for that. Then, you'll need to get the six tapes for Certified Fresh (30G), and lastly the 200 trinkets for Try Hard 2 (50G). It'll take some time, but with the glider and helmet mentioned above, it's far quicker and easier than it otherwise would be. 

Step 6: Instincts
Lastly, it's time to finish up all of the remaining Instincts you have completed yet, intentionally or otherwise. While there are a lot of them, they pretty much all can be done in a few seconds once you know where and how to get them all. Refer to You Trusted Your Instincts (15G) for a full breakdown. That should be the last thing needed for your completion. If you're missing anything else, refer to the guide to see how to unlock it. 

Conclusion:
Goat Sim 3, as expected, is another silly romp, full of parodies, pop culture references, ridiculous achievements, and mindless fun. Have fun with the craziness, and see if you can spot all the videogame references throughout. Hopefully you enjoyed the game and its completion!
 
[XBA would like to thank Necrophage33 for this Roadmap]

Goat Simulator 3 Achievement Guide

Printable Guide
Show completed achievements
Show secret achievements

There are 39 achievements with a total of 1000 points

  • Get flung out of the map

    While there may be multiple ways to do this, the way I did it was to equip the jetpack and then just press rb.png and wait for it to take you up and out of the map. When you respawn, this achievement will unlock.

    The jetpack is located at the top of the smokestacks of the Pointy Foods Factory in the eastern section of Fairmeadows Ranch. You'll have to platform and bounce your way to the top, but nothing crazy. 
  • Run naked on the football field

    You'll first need to rank up your Goat Castle to A Tier to unlock the ability to buy the Birthday Suit in the Fur section of the Wardrobe. Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for doing so.

    Once you have it, head to the Hoofball court, which is marked on your map with a pink circle on the far right of Suburbsville. Simply walk onto the field with the Birthday Suit fur equipped and this will unlock. 
  • Run on the beach in slow motion

    Simply go to any of the multiple beaches around the map, such as the one on the west coast of the northeastern region. Once there, press dpad-left.png to activate slow motion, and then just move around until this achievement unlocks. 
  • Use your Kärring to knock another Kärring down

    For this achievement, you'll first need to finish the 'No Trespassing' Event in Fairmeadow Ranch (refer to New Goat Order (15G) if you need help, but it's pretty straightforward). After beating the granny, the nearby basement door will open. Head inside to be transported to a classic PC game. Head through the doors until you get to a room with four or so grannies shooting at you. In this room is a new piece of gear to pick up called the Karring. Pick it up and shoot with rb.png at the grannies. The first one you defeat with this gear will unlock this achievement.
  • Find That clown

    For this achievement, you'll need to head into the sewers (location shown below). Once inside, head straight and look for an opening on the right. Head inside to find "that" clown and unlock this achievement.


  • Give Big Foot some shoes

    You'll first need to complete the 'Bigfoot Sighted' event before you can do this achievement, located in the center of the map. Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for completing it. Once you're done, you'll have "Bigfoot" locked in a cage.

    Now, head to Libertarian Island, up to the base of the giant statue (you can take an elevator up from street level on the west side of the statue). Near the edge of the statue area is a vendor with a green piece of gear near them. Pick it up to get the Fashionista gear. This lets you shoot at people with rb.png to give them clothing.

    Head back to the caged "Bigfoot" (you can zoom in where it was to see the completed green checkmark and mark it on your map again) and shoot at the "Bigfoot". Once you hit it, it'll give it a pair of shoes and you'll unlock this achievement.
  • Find the perfectly round boulder

    In southeastern Downtime, there is a small car garage with a barely open door (screenshot below). To get in, I just ran at the door and then pressed lb.png to ragdoll under it, through the opening. Once inside, there will be a perfectly round boulder. Simply lick it to unlock this achievement. As a side note, there is a trinket inside behind the boulder too.


  • Complete all Instincts

    There are a total of 99 Instincts that need to be completed for this achievement. Instincts are ingame challenges that required completing a specific feat or random task. There are two things you'll need to do to be able to access all Instincts:
     
    • Interact with all of the Instinct shrines around the open world. These are marked on your map as soon as you sync the Goat Tower in the area. There will be an Instinct shrine relatively close to the Tower, marked on your map
    • Collect/purchase specific gear that have Instincts associated with them
    It's this latter point that could hold you up. Here is a list of all of the gear you'll need to access of the related Instincts:
     
    • Abominana - given for completing the 'How it's Made' Event at the Pointy Foods Factory
    • Architect - found inside a building in Goatenburg, right across the street (south) from the 'Community Service' Event marker
    • Ark - complete the 'Forbidden Fruit' secret Event in Fairmeadows Ranch. Head directly west from Redneck Haven, past the pond on the map, and you'll find a big tree glowing with a golden apple on it. Lick the apple to complete the Event
    • Banksy - given at the 'Curator' Event in Downtown
    • Background Checker - in the "Hackerspace" area in Downtown, under/behind the police station. Refer to the Downtown section of Instincts below for a video showing where this location is
    • Brainiac - head to the tallest building in southeastern Goatenburg, with the giant golden globe on top. Headbutt the globe four times to make it rise up and melt the ice south on the mountain. Head to the mountain south of you where the ice melted, and you'll find a UFO with an obvious green crack. Headbutt it and this gear will be there to pick up
    • Channitanium Shield - sitting in the open in the middle of the Costcon gathering in northwestern Downtown
    • Fashionista - head up to the area at the base of the giant statue on Libertarian Island, and one of the vendors at the outer edge has this gear next to them
    • Firework Launcher - must be bought from the Wardrobe, and is available from the beginning of the game
    • Gardener - complete the 'Green Thumbs' Event in Fairmeadows Ranch
    • Ghost Movie Prop - found in the Cyborgs Lair store in Goatenburg, which is across the street (west) from the 'Community Service' Event marker
    • Helium Havoc - complete the 'Go Big' secret Event in Downtown. You'll be doing this for the "Take the scenic route in the balloon cart" Instinct in the Downtown section below. Refer to it for where it's located
    • Holy Book - complete the 'Fit the for Cross' Event in Fairmeadows Ranch, at the cemetery
    • Mermaid Comb - complete the 'Fishing in Bulk' Event in Fairmeadows Ranch
    • Paraglider - right near the Mornwood Falls Goat Tower
    • Pizza Delivery - complete the 'Moving Help' Event in Suburbsville to open up the front door of the house you've been moving boxes to. Head inside and in the back is the gear
    • Police Cap - complete the 'Wanted: Whistleblowers' Event in Downtown
    • Private Helmet - must be bought from the Wardrobe, and is available from the beginning
    • Ricer - at the Pimp-n-Ride building in Fairmeadows Ranch, right out front. The 'Pimp-n-Ride' Event is marked on your map at all times at the building itself, to use as a waypoint to get back
    • Saddle - in a big red barn just west of the Fairmeadows Ranch Goat Tower, sitting on a hay bale in plain sight
    • Tickler - complete the 'Clean Energy' Event in Mornwood Falls. Afterwards, head inside the floating mansion
    • Tower Hat - complete the 'Run for President' Event in Downtown
    • Trainers - complete the 'Community Service' Event in Goatenburg
    • VR Headset - after reaching B Tier in the Goat Castle, head upstairs in the castle towards the throne, then go left into the now-open door, past the huge tentacle, to find the gear beyond it in the small room
    • Wheeler Dealer - given automatically upon completing all 29 ramps in the game. Refer to Daredevil (30G) for doing so
    Before working on the list, I highly, highly recommend that you complete all the ramps first (see Daredevil (30G)) to unlock the daredevil helmet. This, paired with the paraglider (located right by the Mornwood Goat Tower) makes traversal and reaching high areas a piece of cake. It'll make all the ones for reaching the highest point trivial, and help immensely with others.

    Now on to the list of Instincts. Here they all are, and how to complete them

    How To Be A Goat
     
    • Do a backflip - note that you need to "land" the trick for it to count (land on your feet and not ragdoll). Simply jump and hold lt.png and 1LSDown.gif and you should easily be able to do it on flat ground
    • Do a triple jump - triple jumps work in this game the same way as in Mario 64 (if that helps at all). You need to be running forward, then jump, jump again as soon as you land, and jump a third time as soon as you land. Each jump gets progressively higher, and after the third you'll complete this
    • Pin an Instinct - press button-y.png on any Instinct to pin it
    • Reach warp speed while grinding - grind on any of the power lines in the starting area and you'll complete this challenge. You're just looking for a blue spark and a marked increase in speed, which requires grinding for only a couple seconds
    • Equip something in all wardrobe slots - self explanatory. You'll unlock and/or buy gear in all slots through natural progression
    • Do an emote - emotes are done by pressing dpad-right.png to pull up the emote wheel, then select one
    • Do a 720 double front or backflip - as with the backflip, you must land on your feet and not ragdoll for this to count. I had a hell of a time getting the game to count this challenge as complete. In the end, I did it on a trampoline and got it to count there first try, so try doing that if it won't count it when you do it off a high ledge or building
    • Use water to extinguish yourself - you really just need an open flame somewhat near water for this achievement. One of the easiest and earliest opportunities is at the gas station on the far west coast of the starting area. Simply headbutt a gas pump, propane tank, or explosive barrel, and you'll get set on fire. Then, simply jump in the surrounding water. Alternatively, in the Downtime or Goatenburg areas, broken fire hydrants spray water. You can get set on fire from blowing up a car and then hop into a fire hydrant stream
    Fairmeadows Ranch
     
    • Take a batch at Yakedo Hot Springs - Yakedo Hot Springs is marked on your map. Simply jump in the water there
    • Reach the highest point of Fairmeadows Ranch - the highest point is the electrical tower in the south center of the area. It's where the 5G tower for Welcome to Earth (15G) is. Refer to it if you need a screenshot
    • Expose a trash man - this one is pretty misleading. You need to head to the below location, to the trash cans shown in the second screenshot, and headbutt one of them. You'll reveal a person hiding inside it, and complete this one

    • Get scaled down - this happens automatically when completing the Event called 'Backyard Science' in Fairmeadows Ranch
    • Make a scarecrow dance with you - this can be done on any of the scarecrows around Fairmeadoews Ranch (there are a few around the location of the 'Children of the Hay' Event), or any of the alive scarecrows walking around various areas of the map, such as Goatenburg or Downtown. Simply go up to one and use the emote wheel (dpad-right.png) and pick Dance
    Pointy Foods Factory
     
    • Reach the highest point of the Pointy Foods Factory - unsurprisingly, this is one of the two smokestacks on the factory. You must land on its rim for it to count
    • Lick the hermit - the hermit is located up on top of the mountain near the factory. Screenshots below shot the location on the map. There's a guy in a yellow shirt in a pit. Hop in and lick him



    Brumehill Cemetery
     
    • Lay dead in a grace - there are a few open graves in the area. Simply stand in one and press lb.png
    • Reach the highest point of the Brumehill Cemetery - as you might expect, the highest point is the peak of the spire on top of the church in the center of the area
    • Force a ghost to work out - you'll need the Trainers (shoe gear) for this. Then, simply headbutt one of the gravestones to spawn a ghost and then press rb.png to make it do pushups
    Suburbsville
     
    • Jump from the highest diving board - head to the Pool Party area marked on your map, climb the ladder to the top diving board of the pool, and then jump in
    • Reach the highest point of Suburbsville - this is an electrical tower on the far east coast. See screenshots below

    • Make modern art with humans only - this will complete when you complete the 'Artsy Fartsy' Event (see New Goat Order (15G) for all Events)
    • Find what's hiding in the sewers - this will complete when you unlock Where is It? (15G)
    Construction Site
     
    • Put construction workers in the cement mixer - there's a little red cement mixer in the middle of the area (pictured below). You can actually just lick the same worker and put them in the mixer over and over
    • Reach the top of the crane - the crane is impossible to miss in this area since it's huge. Getting to the top is trivial with the daredevil helmet
    Mornwood Falls
     
    • Reach the highest point of Mornwood Falls - actually the highest point is the top of the Goat Tower here. You do actually need to stand on top of it though. The easiest way is to walk up the steps of the Tower and then jump and wall run up
    • Take a bite of the Lumberjack hat - this one is a bit tricky. There are three (to my knowledge) huge Lumberjack statues around the perimeter of the center forest/mountain area of Mornwood Falls. I've pictured just one of the locations below, but any of the three will work. Get on top of the statue's head/hat, and then what you need to do to bite it is pull up the emote wheel and choose the bottom option, Graze. This will bite the hat if you're standing on it and complete this

    • Reach the top of the mountain with a vehicle - for this, you need to get a vehicle up to the Goat Tower in Mornwood Falls. Just next to the tower is the area where the chunk of land rocketed up into the air, leaving a big opening. At the far end of the opening is a parking lot, and there were always cars there for me. You can start from there rather than at the bottom of the mountain. Hop in one of the cars and now you need to drive up to the Goat Tower. I recorded a clip of me doing it. Apologies for the terrible driving! https://www.xbox.com/play/media/CCK8NEWTCC
    Sawmill
     
    • Reach the highest point of Sawmill - as expected, the highest point is the higher of the two smokestacks on the factory; the one with the Hipster Beard gear on top
    San Angora Zoo
     
    • Reach the highest point of San Angora Zoo - the highest point is actually a water tower just south of the zoo. See screenshots below

    • Jump through the rhino statue hole - there are two obvious golden rhino statues right at the entrance to the zoo. Simply jump through the hole they form between the two
    • Exit through the gift shop - all this requires is for you to enter the gift shop building in the zoo, then walk out. That's it. Screenshot below


    Hoofer Dam
     
    • Jump off the Hoofer Dam as Steve - you'll need to first complete the 'Rescue Steve' Event at the Yakedo Hot Springs to unlock Steve, then simply change to him and jump off the top of the dam
    • Balance objects on the 5 posts - this one is a real pain. The video below, courtesy of Trophy Tom, shows where and how to do this one. One think I'll add that made it easier for me was to do it as Steve because he takes up less space. I played as Steve, licked a bottle, used the daredevil helmet to get up onto a post, and then easily had enough room to keep the bottle on the post, let go, jump off, and repeat for the other ones

    Downtown
     
    • Taunt the police house - the police house is shown below in the video for 'Find the Hackerspace,' if you don't know where to find it. Stand out front of the entrance, bring up the emote wheel, and choose Buttshake
    • Reach the highest point of Downtown - the highest point is, unsurprisingly, the top of the Empire State Building
    • Take a person shopping - multiple stored exist in the Downtown region where you can go inside, find an opening changing room, and go in it to get a new piece of gear. One example is Lux, whose location is shown in Club Mohair (30G). For this Instinct, you need to lick any person, bring them into any store with an open changing room, and put them in the changing room
    • Find the Hackerspace - rather than try to explain in words, refer to the following video, again courtesy of Trophy Tom, for the location of the Hackerspace
    • Take the scenic route in the balloon cart - the location of the balloon cart is in the Times Square area, pictured below. Jump on the red pump a few times to inflate the balloon cart. Once the Event completes, hop into the shopping cart. I only had to sit in the cart for a few seconds before this completed



    Goatenburg
     
    • Bring a date to the movies - simply lick any person and bring them into the movie theater (same one you'll be visiting multiple times for Certified Fresh (30G)). Note that you need to take them into the open theater on the left
    • Dance at the rave - the rave in question is accessed in the northwest corner of the town square, pictured below. Head down the steps and inside, down the hall and up the ladder, and then open the emote wheel and choose Dance

    • Reach the highest point of Goatenburg - the highest point is on top of the Goldball Sachs building, which is just south of the central square. This is the building with the big golden globe on top .Stand on the huge wall around the globe
    • Turn sunbathers into seabathers - head to the beach on the west coast and just lick people on the beach and drop them in the water. They don't need to actually be sunbathing to count
    • Take a hobo to the hair saloon - finding the hair saloon is the hard part. Pictures below show where it is. I'm sure there are many hobos that count for this, but I found one under the northern pier on the western Beach. Lick him and take him to one of the barber's chairs

    • Make out with the whale - refer to Real Buoy (15G) for getting inside the whale. Once inside, head to the opposite end to find the whale's teeth. You'll be standing on its tongue. Lick its tongue to complete this
    • Turn reporter Nick Famzi Jr to a dare devil - from what I can tell, this reporter can spawn in more than one place. Below shows where I found him (yes, all the way over in Downtown). Lick him and take him to the daredevil cannon at the base of the Hoofer Dam. Bring him near it and he'll automatically go inside. Now you need to go inside it and shoot yourself, and he'll go with you



    Libertarian Island
     
    • Reach the highest point of Libertarian Island - unsurprisingly, this is the top of the head of the huge Golden statue
    Miscellaneous
     
    • Bounce on a trampoline 10 times in a row - this is far easier if the trampoline is on level ground. Lick and drag one if need be. Then, hop on the edge so you don't bounce, walk to the center, stand still, and jump. You shouldn't have to aim/control yourself at all, and can just wait to bounce 10 times
    • Explode an explosive with an explosive - this is really easy to do at the 'Fishing in Bulk' Event in Fairmeadows Ranch. If you've already used all the explosive for the Event, you can quit to the main menu and return, and they'll respawn
    • Get caught by the police - this works similar to Grand Theft Auto games. Do some "bad" stuff and hope the cops come. This is far more common in city areas like Downtown and Goatenburg. If you see a cop walking around on the street, start headbutting people and the cop will come cuff you and pick you up. You can continue to farm it on the same cop once he lets you go
    • Get fished by a fisherman - there are a number of fishermen in the starting area at the various ponds. Simply jump in the water and lick the lure at the end of the fishing line
    • Slip on some bananas - there are banana peels in various areas of the game, but you can find them all over the Pointy Foods Factory, especially on the roof
    • Travel through vents - this can be farmed on the same vent. There is one right next to the police station, but you'll assuredly come across many on rooftops in Downtown or Goatenburg. Just jump through the same one five times
    • Use fireworks to fly through the air - you may find random fireworks to work towards this, but the easiest way is to head to the fireworks store, pictured below. There are three fireworks on the planters. Touch each one to complete this

    • Drive a firetruck - refer to "Make a firefighter extinguish a burning police officer" below
    • Get a person to pet you - simply go up to any person and pull up the emote wheel, then choose Sit. As long as you didn't aggro them in some way first, they'll pet you
    • Jump on a ramp with a bike - I had a hell of a time finding bikes to ride. The only reliable place I found is pictured below in Goatenburg. Grab a bike (lick it to take it with you) and take it to any of the ramps listed in Daredevil (30G). Try to line it up and then you need to ride it off the ramp and trigger the slow motion and fireworks. It can be annoying to ride a bike, but thankfully you barely need any speed to get this to work

    • Knock over bajamaja's - the main issue here is figuring out what bajamajas are. They are the blue port-a-potties set up all around the game. You don't actually need to knock them over for them to count, you just need to headbutt them. If you find a group, you can headbutt them, travel to a different region and then back, and repeat. I consistently found some in the San Angora Port or the Construction Site
    • Lick someone for 1 minute - this just means lick and hold on to them for that long. No need to do anything, just sit there and wait for a minute to elapse
    • Have a poolparty with 10 people - head to the Pool Party marked on your map in Suburbsville and head inside to the pool. There are plenty of people here. Just lick/toss or headbutt people into the water
    • Create a human electric chain - this one is a bit annoying. How it works is that when you get electrified, you can press rt.png near people to arc and electrocute them. If others are close enough, it'll automatically arc to other people. This Instinct doesn't specify, but you need to connect five people. The issue here is getting a source of electricity to electrify yourself, and then also have five people very close to each other. I found a fuse box right at the entrance to the San Angora Port. Alternatively, all of the traffic lights and street lights in Downtown and Goatenburg, when broken by hitting them with a car, leave an electricity source on the ground for a limited time. Either way, gather five people together close enough to an electricity source by licking them and headbutting them so they're almost touching, then electrify yourself and press rt.png to connect them all
    • Explode 10 people at the same time - I don't believe blowing up a car counts for this. The main explosives that are effective are gas station pumps, propane tanks at gas stations, and red explosive barrels that can also be found at gas stations. There is a gas station in Downtown (pictured in Nasty! (15G)) and also another on the far west coast of Fairmeadows Ranch. The Downtown one may have a higher population of people nearby. Drag ten people into the vincinity of the gas pumps, then headbutt one and the whole gas station should explode and easily hit all nearby people
    • Hit a postman with a newspaper - this unfortunately entirely relies on finding a postman, who can randomly spawn. I believe they generally spawn in the city areas, such as Downtown or Goatenburg. They'll be in blue and shorts, and tossing newspapers. Once you find one, either pick up one of the newspapers he throws or the stack of newspapers he drops by licking it, then headbutt it at him. Once it hits him this will complete
    • Play catch with a person - this is another finicky one. The easiest place to find a ball and a person is at the beach on the west side of Goatenburg. Head there and you'll find volleyballs near the volleyball court. Lick one and set it down in front of a person, ensuring that you don't hit them and then don't move once you set it down. With any luck, the person will pick it up and signal to you to back up so they can throw it to you. Do so, and they'll toss it at you, completing this
    • Do the legendary twisty mcgoat trick - much like the 720 double backflip or frontflip above, this requires you to do two of those (so, a 1440 quadruple flip). Thankfully, you don't need to land this one. This is easiest to do either by jumping off the Mornwood Falls Goat Tower area, or using a trampoline/anything that'll bounce you. Just hold the direction and lt.png until it says "Twisty McGoat" in yellow and this will complete while you're still in mid air
    • Get a police to handcuff a colleague - I'll be honest, I must have completed this inadvertently, because I didn't know it existed until I wrote up this list. I believe you'll need to find a car with two police officers in it, then headbutt one officer so they start kicking you, which will prompt the other to cuff him
    • Force 5 people into one bouncy castle - this can be tricky because if you drop someone into a bouncy castle they'll just start bouncing uncontrollably until they bounce out. The way I was able to do this was to head to the bouncy castle in the town square in Goatenburg, and lick a person, then carefully set them on the edge of the entrance to the castle, on the yellow rim in the front. This shouldn't bounce them, and they should just lie there. I put five people there and it counted for me, without any of them actually bouncing. If it doesn't complete, headbutt them all into the castle
    • Make a firefighter extinguish a burning police officer - this one, which pairs nicely with "Drive a firetruck above," can be a bit of a pain. There is no firehouse or natural source of firemen and firetrucks. Instead, you need to cause a fire and hope that the fire department shows up. The two easiest places to start a fire are the two gas stations, one in Downtown and one on the west coast of Fairmeadows Ranch. You could hope that the police also show up, but to be safe you could find a police officer first, then lick them and bring them to a gas station. Now, headbutt the gas pumps, propane tank, etc., to cause a huge explosion and big fire. It's random if the fire department shows up, so if they don't try at the other gas station, or quit to the main menu and try again. Take your licked police officer and drag them throught the flames to set them on fire, then let them go so the firefighters put them out. Head over to a firefighter, equip the Fashionista, and shoot one to change their outfit for an Instinct below in the Gear section. Then, hop into the firetruck to drive it and unlock the Instinct above, getting three done at once
    • Crash into Rosie using the rhino tractor - you'll first need to complete the Event at the San Angora Zoo to find Rosie and bring her back into her pen in the zoo. Then, head to the location pictured below to find the rhino tractor. Drive it down the nearby road to reach the zoo, and drive it up the stairs and into the big opening in Rosie's pen. Crash into her to complete this

    • Ride a bike for 30 seconds - to be honest, I'm not sure if this can be completed by just balancing like in the first Goat Simulator game, or if you actually need to be moving for 30 seconds. I did it while moving, but try just balancing first without moving to see if this completes. If you need to be moving, here is how I did it. First, finding a bike. The only place I consistently found bikes was in Goatenburg, pictured above. I licked one and took it north to the bridges leading to Libertarian Island. I then hopped on the bike right next to one of the rails along the side of the road on the bridge, and it forced me to slowly ride forward and towards it at the same time. I didn't need to balance, just slowly road diagonally into the rail and forward, making it really easy to complete this Instinct
    Gears
     
    • Attach rockets to 3 people in a row (Firework Launcher) - this one is pretty straightforward, you just need to not miss. Just walk right up to three people so you don't miss, and shoot right at them
    • Change the color of bikes (Ricer) - as noted multiple times above, the only reliable source of bikes I found was the bike shop in Goatenburg, pictured above in the previous section. There are four bikes inside. Change the color of each, then fast travel away to a different region, fast travel back, and repeat until you do 10 bikes
    • Create floating cars (Helium Havoc) - simply shoot a few darts at vehicles. They can be parked or driving, so just walk around the cities and shoot at all the vehicles you see
    • Make a human head big (Brainiac) - simply press rb.png while facing a person and just wait for their head to grow
    • Measure something of 100m (Architect) - simply press rb.png (not sure if you need to be against a building or anything) to start the tape measure, then run for 100m to complete this
    • Populate the zoo with more animals (Ark) - head into the San Angora Zoo and spam rb.png to spawn animals until this completes
    • Slap people with a fish (Mermaid Comb) - just shoot people with rb.png to hit them with fish. Must be different people; you can't spam the same person. Just walk around the cities
    • Wear 25 items as a hat (Tower Hat) - this isn't cumulative. You need to have 25 items on at once. Just lick then press rb.png, repeating until this unlocks. Easily done in the city with all the road cones, garbage cans, etc.
    • Arrest a goat (Police Hat) - fast travel to the Fairmeadows Ranch Goat Tower. There is always a goat walking around next to it. Just press rb.png near it
    • Disguise the police (Fashionista) - unfortunately the person behind the counter at the police station doesn't count for this. Either find a cop on the street or cause some chaos until they show up, then shoot one with the Fashionista equipped
    • Do a trick while having a goat ride you (Saddle) - fast travel to the Fairmeadows Ranch Goat Tower. There's always a goat walking around next to it. Put it on your back, then just jump and do a backflip on the ground
    • Drive the toy car at high speed for 20 seconds (Wheeler Dealer) - this one was very confusing to me at first. The toy car is the thing that drives around on the hat itself; you won't actually be driving a car. The toy car speeds up as you hold rb.png until a car spawns. So, what you need to do is hold rb.png but then let go before a car spawns, then hold it again to keep it at high speed. The rhythm is a little awkward at first, but you want to hold rb.png for a couple seconds, let go for a split second, then hold again for a second, let go for a split second, etc. You're only letting go very briefly so a car doesn't spawn, then back to holding it
    • Force a person to hug you (Private Helmet) - this headgear puts a target on the ground out in front of you. Place it on a person and press rb.png, then look straight down so the target is under you, and press rb.png again to force the person to interact with you. I'm not sure what decides if they attack you or hug you, but it shouldn't take more than a couple times for a person to hug you
    • Force someone to hit another person (Private Helmet) - same as above but with two different people instead of a person and you
    • Force 10 people to do pushups at the same time (Trainers) - I found it challenging to get 10 people in the same area by licking them, so what I did was go to the top of Libertarian Island, the area around the statue's base, and just ran in circles around it pressing rb.png. There were enough people to get 10 doing pushups within a few seconds
    • Glide 30 seconds with the paraglider (Paraglider) - this is easy enough to do from the Mornwood Falls Goat Tower out towards the water
    • Hack another goat (Background Checker) - fast travel to the Fairmeadows Ranch Goat Tower to find a goat walking around next to it, then just press rb.png near them
    • Hit 5 people or objects in one shield throw (Channitatium Shield) - I did this in the Coscon area where there are lots of people and objects, but I'm sure tons of areas will work. Just don't return the shield until the challenge completes
    • Make magic plants grow 15 times (Gardener) - this one is a little vague. You need to grow 15 separate seeds up to quite a high height. You can actually throw 15 seeds in a circle around you (it needs to be on soil, not city streets). Then, while standing among all the seeds, baa over and over to grow them until you get the challenge to progress. It takes over ten baas to get the challenge to progress, so keep at it
    • Make another goat float using helium (Helium Havoc) - fast travel to the Fairmeadows Ranch Goat Tower to find a goat next to it, then shoot it a couple times until it floats away
    • Make a goat head huge (Brainiac) - fast travel to the Fairmeadows Ranch Goat Tower to find a goat next to it walking around. Press rb.png while facing it and wait for a couple minutes for its head to get massive
    • One-shot 10 NPCs simultaneously (Tickler) - this one is a bit of a pain. I did it the same time as having 10 people in a pool party though. Head to Pool Party on your map, throw at least ten people in the pool (they never get out, so you can just keep chucking them in), then hop in the water and try to get at least 10 in a line so you can shoot them all at once
    • Possess the same person 5 times (Ghost Movie Prop) - just spam rb.png near a person and follow them around until this completes
    • Tag the founding father's face (Banksy) - the founding father is the giant gold statue on Libertarian Island. Use the fan behind it to launch up onto its shoulder, then tag its neck
    • Turn three people into Abominanas at the same time (Abominana) - head to the zoo, city, etc., where there are clusters of people and just turn them all quickly
    • Deliver a pizza to a pizza deliverer (Pizza Delivery) - there is always a pizza deliverer next to the Mornwood Falls Goat Tower. Simply fast travel there and shoot him
    • Give a firefighter a new accessory (Fashionista) - see the end of the section above for getting a firefighter to put out an officer on fire
    • Play in VR for 5 minutes (VR set) - just leave it turned on for 5 minutes, and idle if you don't want to try to play in first person
    • Send people to heaven (Holy Book) - just run around pressing rb.png at all the people you can find. Cities, the zoo, the cemetery, etc., are all good places to find large groups of people
    • Send ghosts to heaven (Holy Book) - same as above but do it at the Brumehill Cemetery after headbutting gravestones to spawn ghosts
  • Lick the croissant

    On the western edge of Downtown, just south of Coscon, there is a big golden donut statue. You see to headbutt it first to knock it loose, then lick it to unlock this achievement.


  • Make like Pinocchio and get eaten!

    Off the east coast of the northeastern region is a red buoy floating in the water (pictures below). Head to it and land on it. A whale will eat you after a second or two, and this achievement will unlock.

    Getting out is its own Event, which just requires you to headbutt the huge uvula three times. I did this by bouncing off the nearby camping tent to reach it.


  • Become an Egg

    Just west of the Cemetary in Fairmeadow Ranch there's a barn (location pictured below), and on one side of it is a bell and a red food dish (screenshot below). All you need to do is headbutt the bell and then hop in the red food dish so you get eaten. You'll be spat out as an egg and unlock this achievement.


  • Equip the [REDACTED] while playing as [REDACTED] with the [REDACTED] fur

    All this achievement requires you to do is play as the Abominana with the Eggplant head and Eggplant fur. You must also remove any other cosmetic items for the other slots. Your Wardrobe screen must look like in the screenshot below.

    As for unlocking each, Abominana is unlocked by completing the Event in the Pointy Foods Factory on the east end of Fairmeadows Ranch. The Eggplant fur and head are unlocked automatically when you level up your Goat Castle to a higher tier (I believe they unlock at B tier). Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for ranking up and for the event mentioned above to unlock Abominana.

  • Jump off all Ramps

    There are a total of 29 ramps in the game, spread out across all regions of the map. For a ramp to count, you need to drive off of it in a vehicle. The game will go slow motion and change the camera view to let you know it counted. Unfortunately, there's no way to see on your map which ones you've completed, but you can check your collectibles in that menu. The following video shows all 29 ramps in the same order as the collectible menu, which makes it handy to check which ones you may have missed. Full credit to the creator of the video.
  • Find all movie tapes

    There are surprisingly only six tapes to find for this achievement, and they're tied to an Event at the movie theater in eastern Goatenburg. The Event is called 'Lost Relics' and is marked on your map from the start (once you sync the Goat Tower in that area). Unfortunately, these aren't normal collectibles: you don't collect them by touching them. Instead, you need to find them, lick them, and carry them all the way back to the movie theater. You can't teleport a licked item, so you need to bring each tape to the movie theater manually. For each tape to count, you actually need to bring it to the projector room and put it inside the tape player. You'll need to eject the previous one to insert the next one.

    Refer to the following video for the locations of all six tapes. Full credit to the creator of the video.
  • Become Queen of all the goats

    When you reach B rank in the Goat Castle (refer to New Goat Order (15G) for doing so), redeeming your reward will build a throne at the top of the castle. Simply head up to the throne and jump on it to unlock this achievement. 
  • Synchronize with all the Goat Towers

    There are a total of six Goat Towers in the game. They're all marked on your map from the start, as big question marks. Simply head to each and hold button-y.png when prompted until you synchronize with each one. 
  • You touched the servers

    After reaching S rank in the Goat Castle (refer to New Goat Order (15G) for doing so), you'll be able to open the large doors in the Castle and head inside.

    Inside, you'll see the farmer and he'll tell you about a boss fight. Go up to him and knock him off the edge into the void. Now the boss fight will start. 

    The first fight you'll need to avoid the spikes coming out of the ground and wait for him to jump into the center of the arena, then attack him until he retreats. Eventually he'll summon tractors instead, and these are even easier to avoid. Killing hitting him until you drain his health bar. 

    The second fight is hide and side. In the first round, he'll be hiding around the edge of the area behind something. Spin the camera to find him, then headbutt him. The second round has a bunch of crates on the ground. Headbutt them until you find the one with him inside. The third round has four ladders around the edge of the arena. Climb up any of them and look around the rafter to find him to headbutt. The fourth round has a ton of clones. Just keep hesdbutting then all until you find the real one. 

    The third fight is a horrible old school platformer with terrible controls. You can't kill anything or collect anything. Just head right and avoid the thwomps and saw blades. When you get to a seeming boss, just head right past him and into the castle door to end this fight. 

    Lastly, you'll be in a room with the farmer. Simply destroy all the servers to end this phase. 

    With all that done, it's time for the Halo-esque escape sequence. Hop in the car provided and drive to the end. Don't worry about the timer, as it's not a real timer. Just drive to the end to win and unlock this achievement. 
  • Find all Trinkets

    There are a total of 200 trinkets (little golden statuettes) scattered around the entire map. Each area is broken up separately in the Collectibles menu, allowing you to easily see how many and which collectibles you've obtained in each area.

    Before attempting to collect all the trinkets, I highly, highly recommend that you do the ramps first (see Daredevil (30G)) to unlock the daredevil helmet. Also grab the glider if you don't have it already. It's right by the Murwood Falls Goat Tower. With both of these equipped, you can press rb.png over and over to travel very quickly but also to ascend (albeit a bit slowly) higher and higher in the air. This combination is extremely convenient for moving around the map quickly and also getting to heights that would otherwise take some work. 

    Below are videos for each of the regions in the game. Full credit to Trophy Tom for putting these awesome videos together. As he notes in the beginning of each, they're in the same order as the collectibles in the Collectible menu, so if you already found some you can easily see which you have and can therefore skip over in the videos. 

    Fairmeadow Ranch

    Brumehill Cemetary

    Pointy Foods Factory

    Suburbsville

    Construction Site

    Mornwood Falls

    Sawmill

    San Angora Zoo

    Hoofer Dam

    Downtown

    Libertarian Island

    Goatenburg
  • G.O.A.T

     

    160

    Unlock all the achievements

    As the description says, unlock all other achievements to unlock this final one. 
 

Secret achievements

  • Sit through the intro

    When you start a new game, you'll be in a wagon getting driven to the location of this new game. Simply sit there and wait for the intro scene to play out. Eventually the farmer will unlock the wagon and let you out. Stay sitting until this achievement unlocks.
  • Nasty!

     

    15

    Get squirted on by the Fossil Fuel mascot

    At any of the Fossil Fuel gas stations around the map, you'll see a big Fossil Fuel golden mascot shooting oil up over its head. To unlock this achievement, stand under the statue's butt. It'll spray you with gas and unlock this achievement.

    Here is a location for one of the gas stations:


  • Buy the Gators shoes

    Simply go into the Wardrobe menu, to the shoes section at the bottom, and buy the Gators (aka Crocs) shoes to unlock this achievement. I believe these shoes are available from the start, but if not, you'll need to rank up in the Goat Castle (refer to New Goat Order (15G) first to make them available to buy. 
  • Lick a banana as an Abominana

    You'll first need to unlock the Abominana character, which is unlocked by completing the 'How it's Made' Event at the Pointy Food Factory. Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for any help completing it.

    Now you need to play as Abominana and lick any banana. You can find them scattered around the Pointy Food Factory in Fairmeadow Ranch. You'll be looking for little bunches of bananas. Simply lick one to until this achievement.

  • Interact with the shrunken shrink house

    For this achievement, simply complete the Event in Suburbsville called 'Practicing Shrink.' All it requires you to do is go inside the house where the shrink (psychologist) is, hop on the couch next to him, and baa (button-b.png). This will complete the event and shrink the house down. Now simply lick the house to unlock this achievement.

    This event is marked on your map as soon as you sync the Goat Tower for that area. If you've already completed the event, you can either zoom in on the map and see completed events with a green checkmark, or you can go to your Event log, find the completed event, press button-y.png to pin it, and this will jump to its location on your map for you to put a waypoint there to get back.
  • Redecorate the entire Goat Castle

    Before you can unlock this achievement, you'll first need to level up your Goat Castle to S tier, as this unlocks all areas and decor in the castle. Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for doing so.

    Once you've got it all unlocked, you'll need to go through and change the decor at every possible place inside. Starting from when you enter the castle through a Goat Tower, here is a list of all of the places to change decor. You need to press button-y.png when prompted and then scroll left or right at least once to change the decor. Just do it once so it's easy to be sure you changed it from the default decor.
     
    1. Immediately when you enter, a statue on each side, left and right, for two statues total. 
    2. In the main open area, turn around as soon as you walk through the doorway from the above area. There are two little statues on both sides of the door you entered through, and two huge statues just beyond each of those, farther left and right. 
    3. Left (if your back is to the entrance) where all the portals are, there are eight trees in a ring around the area. 
    4. Up the steps from there (just back in the main hall) is a giant statue at the top. 
    5. Head in the doors on the left (after contining toward the throne) and there is a pile of poop on the ground, before you get to the tentacles in the hall. It'll be tough to spot, so just look for the prompt to press button-y.png to change decor
    6. There are two trees, one on each side of the dance floor, looking out over the main floor. 
    7. There are two statues, one on each side of the steps leading up to the throne
    8. There are two statues, one of each side of the door to the boss fight (the one you removed the chains from)
    9. There are three paintings on the steps leading up to the big light switch. You can reach each from the steps by the railing. 
  • Find the trainstation

    This achievement requires you to first find the hobbit house in Fairmeadow Ranch. Location shown in the screenshot below. Headbutt the door down to get inside and grab the ring inside (piece of gear).




    Now take the ring (you can fast travel to the nearby tower) to the lava section (aka Mount Doom) in the center of the map. Screenshot below. There's a cave entrance in the lava. Head inside and jump into the lava below while wearing the ring. This will teleport you to the trainstation and unlock this achievement. Head straight ahead into the light to leave.

  • Sit through the entire yoga session

    Located just north of the Pointy Foods Factory, there is a yoga studio (location pictured below). Head inside, choose one of the mats without a person on it, and just stand on the mat. Don't touch the controller for approximately five minutes, maybe more. The yellow lotus on the wall will gradually fill up, and then this achievement will unlock when the session is over.


  • Find the shady merchant

    In the northeastern end of the northeastern region, there's a pink circle on your map indicating a minigame. Head there and north around the edge of the building by the water, and look over the edge of the railing to the water to see two torches on both sides of a door. Hop down to the platform and press dpad-right.png to pull up the Emote wheel. Choose to 'Bow' and the door with open. Head inside and this achievement will unlock.

    Here are screenshots of the location:


  • Find the secret garage

    On the western edge of Fairmeadows Ranch, there is a little garage right behind the gas station. Drive a car into it (there was always at least one at the gas station right nearby) and press analog-left.png to honk your horn. You'll be lowered into a secret garage and this achievement will unlock.

    Here are two screenshots showing the location:


  • Enter the super secret container rave

    Before you can enter the location for this achievement, you'll first need to unlock and equip the Suited Up gear. To do so, head to the store called Lux in the Times Square area of Downtown (location pictured below). Head inside the shop and into the changing room to automatically have this equipped.




    Now, in northeastern Downtown, you'll see San Angora marked on your map at a port at the water. In this port are a ton of shipping containers. You're looking for the only black one, on top of a pile, with a "Club Mohair" design on the side of it. Location pictured below. Stand at the door and if you're wearing the suit above, the doors will open (not sure if you need to baa or headbutt too). Once inside, you're in quite a maze to reach the rave at the end. Know that there are two trinkets within this maze, so it's in your best interest to grab them while you're here. The way to the rave is through the concrete tunnels you'll see, following the Xs on the walls, past the people and into the rave. Once inside, this achievement will unlock. Just know to also grab the trinket on top of the disco ball before you leave, so you don't have to come back.


  • Unlock the Capra Erectus

    This alternate character is unlocked on Libertarian Island in the northwest corner of the map. On this island, you'll need to go to the southeast corner of it, where the rocks form a cliff that overlook the water. There's a cliff platform that goes around the side of the island you can walk on. Down there, tough to spot from above, is a rock cave entrance blocked by a boulder. You need to baa at the boulder and it'll be removed. Head inside and down, and headbutt/lick the human to become him and unlock this achievement. Location pictured below.


  • Goat Castle - Reach F Tier

    Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for more information. 
  • Start the Alien invasion

    To unlock this achievement, you need to locate three little power plant areas, each containing a 5G tower, and activate each one. In each 5G tower area, there will be three red/orange little beacons that you need to energize with electricity. There will be an open fuse box nearby that you can touch to electrify yourself, and then you need to touch each beacon. The beacons only stay activated for a set amount of time, so you'll need to be quick. Below I've shown screenshots of where each plant is, a picture of the three lit beacons, and a brief explanation of how I did them.

    First 5G Tower:

    In this picture, you can see the fuse box on the left side with the faint blue in it. The three beacons are pretty straightforward. Touch the one right ahead, then climb up the boards on the left to reach the second, and platform across the pipes and boards to reach the third. After lighting the second one, you should jump back down and re-electrify yourself to make sure it doesn't run out before you reach the third.


    Second 5G Tower:

    You'll have to climb up to the area in the picture below to reach the fuse box (on the right by the NPC) and the first beacon ahead of you. Touch it, then immediately grind the wire forward to the beacon in the distance that you can barely see in the image. Then, immediately jump to a roof to the right and grind back in the direction you came to reach the third beacon up and above where you started.


    Third 5G Tower:

    This picture below shows me next to the fuse box. The first beacon is up ahead on the right, the second is at the other end of that yellow/orange pipe running left, and the third is just to the left of the starting area. This one was a little more annoying than the others, but here's what I did: touch the fuse box and jump ahead onto the yellow tarp you can see in front of you, bouncing up and gliding (with the glider) to the first beacon to activate it. Double back by bouncing right back to the fuse box. Touch it again to electrify yourself again. This time, run, jump, and bounce off the same yellow tarp but this time aim yourself left when you bounce, and glide right to the second beacon. Touch it, then quickly jump and glide to the third.
  • Goat Castle - Reach E Tier

    Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for more information. 
  • Goat Castle - Reach D Tier

    Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for more information. 
  • Goat Castle - Reach C Tier

    Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for more information. 
  • Goat Castle - Reach B Tier

    Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for more information. 
  • Goat Castle - Reach A Tier

    Refer to New Goat Order (15G) for more information. 
  • Goat Castle - Reach S Tier

    Reaching higher tiers in the Goat Castle requires you to complete the Events around the open world. The game implies you can increase your rank by causing chaos and such, but the only want to add to your rank is to complete Events, either marked ones on your map or secret ones.

    Speaking of which, normal Events are all marked on your map as soon as you sync the Goat Tower in the area. Once you do, you'll be able to see and set waypoints for each Event in the area. It then just becomes a matter of completing them all. However, you unfortunately won't get enough points from doing all the normal Events to reach S tier; you'll need to do some secret ones too. Fortunately, a bunch of the miscellaneous achievements are tied to secret events. So, first complete all of the normal Events on your map, and then when you go through and get all the miscellaneous achievements, you'll get enough points from secret Events that you'll get the last few points you need to reach S tier.

    Most Events are very simple and straightforward to complete, but all are intentionally vague and some are a real pain. Below are videos for each region in the game, showing all Events and how to complete them. Full credit to Trophy Tom for the awesome videos.

    Fairmeadows Ranch

    Suburbsville

    Mornwood Falls

    Downtown

    Goatenburg

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Goat Simulator 3 Achievement GUIDE FAQ

  • What is the estimated achievement difficulty for Goat Simulator 3?
    The estimated achievement difficulty for Goat Simulator 3 is 3/10.
  • How many offline achievements are there in Goat Simulator 3?
    There are 39 offline achievements in Goat Simulator 3.
  • How many online achievements are there in Goat Simulator 3?
    There are 0 online achievements in Goat Simulator 3.
  • How long does it take to get 100% in Goat Simulator 3?
    The estimated time to get 100% in Goat Simulator 3 is 10-15 hours.
  • How many playthroughs is needed to get 100% in Goat Simulator 3?
    1.
  • How many missable achievements are there in Goat Simulator 3?
    There are no missable achievements in Goat Simulator 3.
  • Does difficulty affect achievements in Goat Simulator 3?
    Difficulty does not affect achievements in Goat Simulator 3.
  • Are there any unobtainable/glitched achievements in Goat Simulator 3?
    There are no unobtainable/glitched achievements in Goat Simulator 3.